Posted in Inspiration, world changes

The Grand Test

(rated PG)

This is the grand test. If you, like me and like all those to whom I minister, and my brothers and sisters on this journey) are here to support the birth of a new world…..things are getting INTENSE!  If we thought it has been rough before…..hang on to your hats!  This, as they say, is where the rubber meets the road. And it is entirely (in the worlds (words) of one of my mentors, Lauren C. Gorgo), “an inside job.”

It goes something like this:

  • Shit happens.
  • We find ourselves triggered (fear, anxiety, anger, rage, self-righteousness, grief, overwhelm, helplessness) by the shit.
  • Then we DO something about the shit.

BUT….it is not about going “out there” to change things. Oh no! It is about going WITHIN to identify the unhealed wound in ourselves that is being triggered by the shit “out there.” Then it is about doing the work we have practiced soooooo long to heal and transform that wound.  Meditation.  Prayer.  Chanting. Reiki. Shamanic healing practices. Movement. Journaling.  Etc. etc. etc.  Now it is time to get out all of our tools and USE THEM to heal ourselves.

Then as soon as we heal one wound, another shows up to take its place. This current cycle of transformation is RELENTLESS.  It keeps coming and when we think we can breathe a sigh of relief, it comes again. This is the real shit!

The energy is relentless because time is of the essence. We are quickly approaching the death of the old world paradigm and the new world is getting ready to take its place.

But it sure doesn’t feel like the promise of new life right now. It feels like death….because that is exactly what it is.  The death of the patriarchy and of all of humanity’s wounds related to patriarchal fear, power and control.  We are transforming these wounds within ourselves – not only for ourselves, but for the sake of the whole entire world.  It is like Christian theologians say about Jesus – “he took on the sins of the world and died for the sake of those sins.”  Personally, I no longer belief that Jesus died for our sins as some sort of sacrifice, but when put in the context of transformation, I can see how this is true.  In moving through his own pain and fear of separation and transforming that in the resurrection, he did the same for all of humanity.

This is what we too are called to do. Again, not as a sacrifice….but in saving ourselves, we are supporting the salvation of our world.  When we heal ourselves of our patriarchal wounds, we are supporting others in the same healing.  Soon, the patriarchy will no longer have the power to trigger our fears and our fears have been healed.

BUT….knowing all this does not make this RELENTLESS Intensity any better. It is excruciating.  Jesus Christ, it is hard.  And yet, the only way out is through.

This is the grand test. It is the Universe (our Soul) asking us again, “Are you sure you’re up for this?  Wouldn’t you rather just fold and go back to the life of blissful ignorance you enjoyed before waking up to your Divine gifts and calling?”  On many days, I can assure you I want to say yes to blissful ignorance.  But as soon as I think that’s the choice I’m going to make, my SOUL steps in on my behalf and pulls me back onto the path.  It seems, we don’t really get to say no.  Like it or not, we are here for a reason.  We signed up for this.  We don’t get to quit.  (dammit!)

So brothers and sisters – put on your big girl/boy panties. Tighten your boot straps and get to work.  Stay true to your path and do not let the “devil” take you from your path.  We are in this together and if you forget this truth….reach out to those you know who LOVE YOU, who value your gifts, who appreciate your vulnerability and who will hold you in your fear, anguish and pain until you are ready to once again hold yourself.  YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Money is one of the grand tools used by the Patriarchy to manipulate and control us through fear.  Heal your money wounds and be free of this conditioning:

Shamanic healing,. Only $9.99.

 

Posted in 6D, Being Human, Christ Consciousness, Empowerment, Inspiration, New World, self-actualization

Ascended Mastery Part 2: Awaiting Our Own Resurrection

In yesterday’s blog, I shared two messages that I received from “beyond” which speak of the consciousness evolution we are currently enjoying (thank you sir, may I have another) and the complete transformation that is happening in those who are agreeing to be awakened to their Divine Self, and who are allowing their Divine Self to become fully embodied in their human form. This is a journey that cannot be explained by the rational mind, neither can it be demonstrated through science, it can only be experienced.

As I’ve been sitting in this deep time of transformation and allowing myself to receive the unique form of transformation that is intended for me, while bearing witness to the same transformation in my spiritual brothers and sisters, I have mostly been sitting in darkness. This is a darkness not of pain, but instead, is stillness and (mostly) immobility.  I find myself unable to create and any attempts I make at engaging are immediately halted by life circumstance.  Weeds have taken over what is supposed to be my gardens.  My house is a cluttery mess.  And I’m uninterested in anything but the novel I’m currently reading and snuggling on the couch with my children binge watching reruns of The Walking Dead and Shameless. 

To those familiar with this journey….it is cave time. Or rather, tomb time.  I/We are in the tomb awaiting the time of our resurrection.  And what will our resurrection look like and the new life that will arise out of it?  Likely nothing like what our former life has been – something so beyond what our life has been that we cannot even imagine it.

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Think of the acorn – do you think it has any idea that it is anything other than an acorn? Can it even grasp that “acorn” is not its true form but that it will eventually become a majestic and stately oak?  What about the caterpillar?  Does it have any idea that one day it will no longer crawl around on the ground eating everything in sight but that one day it will sprout wings and fly, drinking the sacred nectar of flowers?  This is as it is for us.  When we die to the life we have been living and allow ourselves to enter into the tomb of transformation, we have no idea what our new life will look like.  When we arise out of the tomb into our new life…..we have no idea what or who we will become.  St. Paul says it much better than I in his letter to the Corinthians which just happens to be this morning’s scripture:

Brothers and sisters: Someone may say, “How are the dead raised? With what kind of body will they come back?” You fool! What you sow is not brought to life unless it dies. And what you sow is not the body that is to be but a bare kernel of wheat, perhaps, or of some other kind. So also is the resurrection of the dead. It is sown corruptible; it is raised incorruptible. It is sown dishonorable; it is raised glorious. It is sown weak; it is raised powerful. It is sown a natural body; it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual one. So, too, it is written, “The first man, Adam, became a living being,” the last Adam a life-giving spirit. But the spiritual was not first; rather the natural and then the spiritual. The first man was from the earth, earthly; the second man, from heaven. As was the earthly one, so also are the earthly, and as is the heavenly one, so also are the heavenly. Just as we have borne the image of the earthly one, we shall also bear the image of the heavenly one.

1 Cor 15: 35-37, 42-49

 

Wait for it….something magnificent is about to happen!

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Love,

Lauri

Posted in 6D, Authentic Freedom, Being Human, Christ Consciousness, End of the World Prophecies, Freedom, Inspiration, world changes

Nothing More To Forgive – from Shadow to Gods

Today’s blog is for those interested in the evolution of human consciousness and where we are in our journey as we mark this full moon in Pisces (August 29, 2015) and the final days of Saturn’s journey through Scorpio as it draws closer and closer to Sagittarius.

For the past two and a half years, as Saturn has been journeying through Scorpio, we have been in a place of DEEP SHADOW work. As the archetypal Lord of The Underworld, Scorpio (associated with Pan, Hades, Gwynn Ap Nudd, Cernunnous) has been leading us through the darkness of our own depths where we have been invited to exhume the corpses of all those things we would rather keep hidden away.

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Individually and collectively, we have been forced to look at all those things we have repressed, suppressed, denied, ignored or locked away, hoping we’d never have to look at it again. Every past hurt, wound, betrayal, etc. has resurfaced to haunt us and every fear, compulsion, and rejected aspects of ourselves have risen so as to be seen. The past two and a half years have been reminiscent of the evil queen in Snow White looking into the mirror to see what can be seen. And what we have been shown has not been pretty.

This time of deep reflection and introspection has not been without purpose. As Scorpio has assisted us in bringing all of our darkness to light, it has been done for the sake of healing and transformation. We are being invited to see what remains to be seen so that we can heal it and change it – ONCE and FOR ALL! Saturn in Scorpio (for those who have been willing to do the work) has been a time of grand FORGIVENESS. Forgiving old hurts and past wounds, but most importantly, forgiving ourselves. Every unhealed wound, disappointment, betrayal, etc. stands in the way of us enjoying the FREEDOM that is our Divine inheritance. Every experience, memory, situation that we ignore or suppress keeps us from enjoying the fullness of our unique giftedness. Every part of ourselves we condemn, ignore, reject, imprisons us within fear and keeps us from the life of meaning and fulfillment we were meant to enjoy.

With Saturn in Scorpio, we have learned that forgiving ourselves is the key to freedom and that everything we judge outside of us as having hurt, offended, wounded, condemned us is ultimately a reflection of our own condemnation of ourselves. Scorpio holds us ACCOUNTABLE to no one but ourselves and assures us that it is not us against them, but us against our very selves. When we learn this truth and take responsibility for EVERY negative reaction we have toward “the other” as reflecting an unhealed experience within ourselves, we have learned what Scorpio wanted us to learn, and we, like Saturn are ready to move from Scorpio into Sagittarius. In Sagittarius, we enjoy the rewards of hard-earned wisdom as we settle into a life of authenticity and purpose reflective of our most authentic selves. In the journey through Scorpio, we had an opportunity to understand our excesses and appreciate the values of temperance and simplicity, tested in the fire of deep shadow work. In Sagittarius, we can rest and enjoy the fruits of our labors while allowing our deep inner transformational work to take root, anchoring us in a place of purpose and intent. In other words, after completing our journey through Scorpio, there is nothing more to forgive.

Mucha

“There is nothing more to forgive.” This is the message I heard in meditation this week while observing my own transit out of Scorpio and moving toward Sagittarius (which will be complete on September 17th….interestingly the day I arrive home from Muse Camp!). In this meditation, I saw the wounded, hurt, judgmental, dualistic version of myself as a shadowy version of me. I saw it standing in its place of perceived separation – where it feels alone, powerless, wounded and afraid. Beside the shadowy aspect of myself, I beheld a brilliant version of myself I have come to call, “The Goddess Queen.” This version of myself is my true self – a radiant, light-filled being attired as a queen, reflecting the power of a goddess. I this version of myself with long, flowing white hair, wearing a sparkling crown of silver and gold bedecked with diamonds and stars. I was wearing a long flowing gown in shades of white, stitched in brocade patterns of silver and gold. The gown was fitted at the bodice with a heart-shaped neckline. On my feet were slippers of sparkling silver and gold. I was the Queen. I was the Goddess. What I realized in seeing this vision is that I AM the Queen. I Am the Goddess. And this is the energy and power of my truest, most authentic self, the one I came to be on this plane.

Then I saw the Queen/Goddess approach the shadowy, wounded part of myself. And rather than reject her or send her away, The Queen/Goddess embraced the shadowy aspect of myself and brought her into herself. As she brought me toward her, she whispered in my ear, “THERE IS NOTHING MORE TO FORGIVE.” Then I saw the part of me that had worked so hard to complete the shadowy work ascend into the heavens as she was welcome by the heavenly host and ushered into her place in heaven where she could be rewarded for her hard work and find rest for all she had accomplished. Then, all that remained was the Goddess/Queen.

I AM the Goddess/Queen, complete with all the lessons I’ve learned, with nothing more to forgive.

And so are you! Your hard-earned journey through the shadows is coming to its own place of completion. You have fought a hard and difficult battle. You have taken responsibility for your own pain, your own fears, your own compulsions, your own projections. And in doing so, you have made yourself ready for the time of your own reign – the reign of the God/Goddess/King/Queen that dwells within you and that which will uphold you in your own unique giftedness and the unique way you are called to be a LEADER of change in our world. Congratulations, you have completed your mission….and there is nothing more to forgive.

 

 

 

To learn more about Saturn in Scorpio, go here:  http://www.cafeastrology.com/saturninscorpiotransit.html .

Posted in 6D, Authentic Freedom Academy, Education Reform, Empowerment, Magic, Spiritual Practices, Superheroes

10 Ways We Are Like Hogwarts!

Authentic Freedom Academy isn’t any old academic institution.  We don’t teach history or ‘rithmetic; instead, we offer programs and services in support of your journey of self-actualization.  The roots of our work are in education, psychology and spirituality and the pillars are mindfulness, creativity and active imagination.  The end result is transformation and empowerment.  No, this work isn’t for everyone….but it is for the strong and courageous, the brave and insane, and those who believe there is more to life than Kanye and Kim and what might be reported on Fox News.   In short, Authentic Freedom Academy is a lot like Hogwarts.  Let me show you how:

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1) Here there be MAGIC!

Life is a miracle and fantastically magical. Our desire is to help you see that magic!

2) We solemnly swear we are up to ALL GOOD!

To those attached to status quo, things as they are, a fearful, materialistic world, then it might look like we are entirely up to no good…….but for those with magic in their hearts and who can see past the illusion…..it’s all good!

3) Mischief Managed! Every day.

Giving you the tools you need to overcome the inner and perceived external obstacles to your own magical magnificence!

4) Platform 9 ¾:

The only way to get here is to close your eyes, point your luggage cart in the direction of that brick wall in front of you, run and TRUST.

5) Defense Against the Dark Arts:

Yes, there is darkness in our world. Fear too. We help you name those fears and give you tools for transcending them.

6) Lord Voldemort:

We all have an inner adversary – that voice of fear that keeps us small and seeks to keep us from the magical purpose for which we were born. We help you distinguish this voice from the voice of your Truth and give you tools for quieting “He who must not be named” so that you can hear the still, quiet, voice of your own SOUL.

7) Pensieve:

Through mindfulness, creativity and active imagination practices, we help you remember and retrieve the forgotten pieces of your Soul.

8) Fantastical Creatures:

Why can’t there be dragons, pixies, mermaids, talking pictures, griffins, giants and shapeshifters? In the world of magic….all things are possible….and everything we can imagine is here to teach us about ourselves. Here, we embrace them.

9) Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore:

Each and every person is uniquely gifted and called to be a source of love and transformation in the world. Our teachers and guides are here to help you find yours.

10) Harry Potter of course!

We all need our heroes – those who have gone before us in search of their inner treasure and who have found it. We look to the great spiritual teachers of our human (and non-human) past to learn how to get there!

To learn more about Authentic Freedom Academy, please contact our “Head Mistress” (wink!)  Lauri Ann Lumby lauri@authenticfreedom.love or (920) 230-1313.   Or….check out our weekly Superhero Gatherings and discover your magic!

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Posted in Empowerment, Inspiration, Lessons, Magic, Mystics

The Thirteenth Fairy

You most likely know me as the evil fairy from Disney’s Sleeping Beauty, or more recently as Maleficent in Disney’s life-action revisioning of the Sleeping Beauty tale.  While the latter was closer to the truth in its telling, neither got it right.  No wonder, as the origin of both tales is the story of Briar Rose as told by the brothers Grimm – and the good brothers, in their telling, were about as far off from the truth as any tale could be.  For I am the Thirteenth Fairy and only I and my sisters know the real truth of who I am and what I am here to do.

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I am the Thirteenth Fairy – thirteenth of the thirteen, born on the thirteenth day of the thirteenth month – for in our age, time is marked by the movement of the moon. Unlike the twelve months marked in cultures where god is only HE and where the sun honored as his symbol, we mark thirteen where the feminine in all of HER manifestations are honored as sacred.  Our thirteenth month, you now call mid-Capricorn, a time of great darkness – when all of humanity retreats from the active world, where the time of harvesting is done, all has been stored up for the winter the mid-winter celebrations complete.  The thirteenth month is a time of rest, a time of restoration, a time of deep inner reflection and self-contemplation, for in the depths of winter, there is nothing much else to do.  The thirteenth month in which I was born, and over which I reign, is a time for sleeping, dreaming, and inner growing.

Whether spring, summer, fall or winter, we all have our “thirteenth months” – times for retreat, introspection, resting, restoring, enjoying the fruits of our labor and deep, inner growth and transformation.  The thirteenth month is the time of the pine which stands proud against the glistening snow, the oak which retains its leaves until spring, the winter wheat which sleeps in the ground waiting for the returning warmth of the sun before showing its green.  It is the time of the stag and the hunt, the boar with its ivory tusks digging for mushrooms, the time of the wolf howling under an ancient moon while and honoring the medicine of mistletoe and holly.  The thirteenth month is related to night – for during the thirteenth month, even the sun sleeps.  As such, the thirteenth month is guarded by all creatures of the night – snowy white owls, ravens, bats, Luna moths and the black panther.  As the Thirteenth Fairy, in the company of my brothers, Pluto, Pan, Hades, Gwynn and Cernunnos, I am the guardian of the thirteenth month and all related to this timing.

It is easy to see then, where the brothers Grimm got the idea of the spindle and the curse of eternal sleep.  They got the sleeping part right, but they got it backwards.  While I have dominion over the time of sleep, my full power is in the waking.  For after we sleep we must awake – lest we die.  My task is to wake you up.  As in all the fairytales which bear the mark of my presence – the evil queen, the wicked witch, the jealous stepmother, the fearful mother, I have my tools – whether they be poisoned apples, flying monkeys, fields of poppies, red shoes that dance you to death, deadly combs, suffocating corsets or magic mirrors, they all serve a single person – to wake you up and set you on your quest.  But the quest I set you on is not one for the handsome prince, golden coins or riches.  Instead, the quest I set you on is the QUEST FOR YOUR SOUL – for here is where you shall find your true happily ever after!

Unlike the Fairy Godmother and other expressions of her presence, I do not leave you to your own devices – only to watch you fail.  No, I am there with you, every step of the way – whispering encouragement, offering tools of support and guidance, picking you up when you fall, drying your tears and holding you in my embrace when you feel you can’t go on.  I do this for you, because I have been there and done this for myself – successfully.  And I could not have done this without the Thirteenth Fairies who have gone before me.  For unlike the twelve fairies of light who only have eyes for the “good,” as the Thirteenth Fairy – I (we) see life for what it is – light when the way is easy and dark when the journey gets tough.  Unlike our pixie dust sisters who might shy away from the dark, we know the darkness is not something to be judged or feared, but honored as sacred, for we know that it is in the darkness where we will find our treasure!

It is in the darkness where we have an opportunity to face our fears, to stare down our demons, to battle the enemies that reside within – self-doubt, envy, hatred, sloth, pride, gluttony, selfishness and greed.  For every enemy we look in the eye and release the power it holds over us, we are one step closer to the boon.  Here is where the treasure lies – deep within all that we fear, beneath the muck and the mire of our unhealed wounds, past the tangled thorns of hurts and former betrayals, beyond our dreams of vengeance.  Here is our treasure and only the Thirteenth Fairy has the courage, the strength, and expertise, honed on experience, to accompany you to these depths.  I am the Thirteenth Fairy.

So, you may call me what you will, evil queen, horrible stepmother, wicked witch, malevolent fairy, the devil’s mistress, but I know the truth.  I am the Thirteenth Fairy and when my presence is made known in your life, a terrific journey is about to begin.  You then have a choice, to come with me and discover the most remarkable treasure – the treasure of your Soul, or turn away – where you are sure to die from the refusing.

Copyright 2015  Lauri Ann Lumby

Lauricurtsie.jpgLauri Ann Lumby is the Thirteenth Fairy – born on the thirteenth day of the thirteenth month with thirteen letters in her given name.  As a trained spiritual director, shamanistic practitioner, creativity partner, and life guide, Lauri helps to awaken you to the call of your soul and supports you on the way – as every good Thirteenth Fairy will do!

Posted in Empowerment, Freedom, Midlife Journey, Spiritual Practices, teachers

“Mischief Managed” – Book Review for Wild Mind by Bill Plotkin

I’ve recently been enjoying the books of Bill Plotkin, psychologist, author, wilderness guide and cultural visionary.  I just completed his latest book, Wild Mind, and I LOVE IT!  Wild Mind provides a map for the journey of birthing our Soul, offering tools for spiritual and psychological healing and growth.  I love this book! 

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Assuming the guise of modern-day wizard, Bill Plotkin is his latest release, Wild Mind, presents readers with a gift akin to the Marauder’s Map of Harry Potter fame.  The Marauder’s Map is gifted to only the bravest of wizards and can solely be opened by those clever enough to uncover the incantation for its opening, “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”  Upon opening the map, the wizard discovers insight into the potential obstacles and dangers along the path of their quest.  The Map of the Human Psyche serves this very purpose in the human quest for the Soul – defined by Plotkin as “a person’s unique purpose or identity.”

With Plotkin’s guidance, readers are invited to plunge into the depths of their psyche so that they may uncover and then transform all of the ego-constructs, defense mechanisms, and inner obstacles to living their Soul’s purpose.  With a breadth and depth akin to the Enneagram, Plotkin presents a comprehensive approach to spiritual and psychological growth that speaks in images and symbols that are universal and fully grounded in our indigenous spirit.  In his nature-based map of the psyche, Plotkin gives readers the tools and support they need to face all that they have hidden in the darkness so that they might bring them to the light in service to their unique identity and purpose.  In freeing their imprisoned Souls and enjoying the contentment, fulfillment and joy that this brings, readers can then confidently close the map, tapping it with their wand while proudly proclaiming, “Mischief Managed.”

Wild Mind is perfect for psychologist, therapists, counselors, ministers, and spiritual directors; for self-directed seekers of spiritual and psychological growth and would be well suited for an intentional group gathered around this same intention.

billPlotkinBill Plotkin, PhD, describes himself as a “psychologist gone wild.”  A cultural visionary, author and wilderness guide, he’s been blazing new trails for decades.  His ecocentric re-visioning of psychology invites us into a conscious and embodied relationship with soul and with the natural world.  His previous books are Soulcraft and Nature and the Human Soul.  He lives in southwestern Colorado.  You can learn more about Bill, his programs and services at http://www.animas.org.

Posted in Authentic Freedom

Authentic Freedom – a new psychology

Today’s blog answers the question, “What is Authentic Freedom” and acknowledges it as a helpful tool in the fields of psychology, spirituality, religion, human development and human evolution.  In fact, I might be so bold as to hail it as a new psychology, inspired by the work of those who have gone before, but going about it in a whole new way. 

lauriprofilebwwebshot2013Authentic Freedom and Psychology:  If we agree with the American Psychological Association’s definitions: Psychology is the study of the mind and behavior. The discipline embraces all aspects of the human experience — from the functions of the brain to the actions of nations, from child development to care for the aged. In every conceivable setting from scientific research centers to mental health care services, “the understanding of behavior” is the enterprise of psychologists, then I am a psychologist.  While I don’t yet have the alphabet soup behind my name to authenticate this title within the Western hierarchical and dualistic paradigm (I’m working on it), I have spent the last 48 years of my life observing, exploring and investigating human behavior and the motivations behind it.

My path:  In the tradition of the ancients (Moses, The Buddha, Patanjali, Jesus, Ignatius or Loyola, Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross, Yogananda, etc.) my path  began in my religious (Catholic) upbringing and expanded into contemplative practices and mystical experiences which provided insights into the human experience and our response to it.  Combining my own personal experiences with both ancient and modern knowledge of human consciousness and the material world, led to the development of my own approach to helping people to understand their behaviors and motivations, especially those thought patterns and behaviors that have become an obstacle to finding meaning, purpose and healthy connections in their lives.  I call this approach Authentic Freedom.

Authentic Freedom is an interdisciplinary approach to the psychological and spiritual wellbeing and formation of adults.  Authentic Freedom provides tools through which you are able to identify and move through the inner obstacles to the peace, joy and fulfillment you long for and are driven to obtain. In addition to providing symptomatic relief,  Authentic Freedom provides a framework upon which you are empowered to cultivate a deep and abiding peace and a fulfilling life.  The Authentic Freedom tool kit includes:

  • Accessible meditation and contemplation practices
  • Cognitive learning
  • Creative expression
  • Confidential engagement
  • Movement practices
  • Guided imagery
  • Archetypal tools including:  The Myers-Briggs personality profile, The Enneagram
  • Dreamwork
  • Soundwork (mantra, chant, music)
  • Energy work
  • Ritual

Authentic Freedom is accomplished one-on-one through Spiritual Direction/Mentoring and in group settings through classes, retreats and workshops.

Become an Authentic Freedom Facilitator

If you are a therapist, counselor, medical doctor, massage therapist, Reiki practitioner, holistic wellness practitioner, yoga instructor, minister, life-coach, or just plain passionate about human evolution and our longing for transformation, Authentic Freedom would be a powerful tool to have at your disposal.  As an Authentic Freedom facilitator, you have the flexibility of sharing this resource with clients and students one-on-one, in a classroom setting, through workshops and retreats and even through online forums.  To learn more about becoming an Authentic Freedom Facilitator, click HERE.

Posted in Midlife Journey, Returning book

Returning: “leaves no stone unturned.”

Today’s review of my soon to be released book, Returning- a woman’s midlife journey to herself, is from poet, creator, lover and overall beauty maker, Ann Hartenbach.  We have the great fortune of having Ann living in our own backyard near Oshkosh, Wisconsin where she daily creates and inspires others to do the same.  Ann is passionate about women’s issues, specifically, a woman’s journey to her own freedom and passion.  I heart Ann and her work and am honored for her kind and beautiful words!!!!  Thank you Ann!

Returning - A Woman's Midlife Journey to Herself
Returning – A Woman’s Midlife Journey to Herself

Review:

AnnHartenbachLauri Lumby Schmidt really delivers with Returning–A woman’s midlife journey to herself.  She is fearless in laying out her own transformation and gives us a much needed guide from a woman’s perspective on how to navigate our own. Her refreshing approach with poetry and prose is deeply honest and you will find yourself following along gladly for a deeper understanding of yourself. Returning is intimate, rich and leaves no stone unturned when it comes to women in midlife. It couldn’t be better for anyone wanting to unravel the very best of who they are.

-Ann A. Hartenbach, www.choosingheart.com

Ann is the author of:

–Where Blue Birds Fly-Poetry for Ascension (2005 Creative Heart Publications)

–Christmas Coffee, poem published 2007 by The International Library of Poetry in Forever Spoken 

Posted in Enneagram, Healing, Inspiration, Lessons

From Woe to Wonder

Today’s blog explores the journey of the perfectionist and how the Enneagram can be a tool to help us change our perception from woe to wonder.  (PS  Thank you to Stevie Nicks for being my inspiration for WONDER!)

Ennea-What?

The Enneagram is one of the tools that I use with clients and students to help them identify their own unique temperment, their soul’s purpose and to help them find healing of certain compulsive behaviors or means of perception.  To learn more about the Enneagram, go to:  http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/.

Confessions of a Perfectionist

I cannot share the Enneagram with others if I haven’t and don’t continue to use this tool for my own journey of transformation….and boy have I!  According to the Enneagram philosophy, I am a PERFECTIONIST.  As a perfectionist (point 1 on the Enneagram), I see the world through the lens of “What is wrong here?”  While this lens has its gifts in its ability to identify where improvements or changes can be made in a certain situation or experience, it can also be a curse, especially when the “what is wrong here?” is something that I do not have the power to change or when I turn that question on myself, “What is wrong with me?” or “What did I do wrong or what could I have done better or differently.”  Again, there is a gift as it is through this perception that I have been driven to personal growth and transformation.  The curse, however, is when the drive to personal growth becomes self-loathing.

If you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram and how it might help you in your journey, contact Lauri at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.com

From Perfectionist to Martyr

The Enneagram has helped me to understand that when I am in a place of extreme stress or anxiety, my perfectionism turns on itself and I move toward my point of disintegration – The Martyr (point 4 on the Enneagram).  The martyr is all about self-loathing, woe is me, victimhood.  The martyr feels misunderstood, alone, rejected, abandoned, unloved.  “Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I’m gonna eat some worms.”  When my perfectionist turns on itself and I become the martyr, I dress in black, wear kohl colored eye shadow and liner, mope around the house, lick my wounds, write dark and dreadful poetry, listen to Nine Inch Nails and Marilyn Manson and spend a lot of time moaning and feeling sorry for myself.  I really don’t like my martyr too much…but she doesn’t really like me either…so there!

If you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram and how it might help you in your journey, contact Lauri at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.com

From Martyr to Enthusiast

The Enneagram has also taught me that in order to heal my perfectionist and her tendency to martyrdom, I am invited to move toward my point of integration – Point Seven or The Enthusiast.  The Enthusiast is the person that sees the silver lining in every cloud, looks at the world through the lens of “what is good here?” and is able to see through the challenges of life to the good that can come out of it.  The Enthusiast moves through life with a graceful ease.  They are joyful and optimistic about the world and their place in it.  They trust the movement of life and are able to yield to the Divine that is carrying them toward their hopeful future.  The Enthusiast in its higher state is the exact opposite of the Martyr.

If you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram and how it might help you in your journey, contact Lauri at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.com

Moving from Woe to Wonder

I recently had an opportunity to experience this journey from perfectionist to martyr to enthusiast first hand.  After getting “dumped” (that’s my martyr talking) by my boyfriend of 10 months, I plunged headfirst into the downward spiral of perfectionist to martyr.  There is nothing like a heartbreak to plunge us into the depths of our fears, anxieties, unhealed wounds and COMPULSIONS. “What did I do wrong?  What could I have done better?  How could he not love me?  What is wrong with me that he can’t love me?  Maybe no one will ever love me?  Maybe I’m not deserving of love.  Is love even real?  How did I get that wrong?  How did I miss the signs?  Why did I ignore the signs?  What is wrong with me?”   BLAH BLAH BLAH.  But this past week, I suddenly understood what I have spent nearly twenty years avoiding.  There is a remedy to the darkness of martyrdom….and that is to shift my perspective from WOE to WONDER.  Instead of being taken into the dark swirling mass of martyrdom, I am invited to move toward Point 7 – the Enthusiast.  Here, I am invited to look at the relationship and the breakup for:  What is good here?  What are the gifts that came out of the experience?  What are the healings that took place?  How did I grow?  What did I learn? And moving past the relationship:  What are the new opportunities I get to experience?  What are the different choices I can choose to make next time?  How might the next time be even better than the last?  Instead of looking at the relationship and the breakup through the lens of doom, I can look at it through the lens of hope.  Now I get it!  I’m not saying that my martyr is totally done feeling sorry for herself, but at least I understand that when I am tempted to plunge into the black, all I have to do is flick my magic wand and look at life through the lens of wonder.  In the meantime, I continue my intentions of forgiveness  (of other and of self) while enjoying the freedom to more diligently pursue my personal and professional dreams, which by the way are filled with mystery, magic, wonder and a sprinkle of fairydust.  🙂

If you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram and how it might help you in your journey, contact Lauri at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.com. 

Through what lens do you look at the world?

How are you being invited to look at the world through the lens of wonder?

Lauri Lumby

http://yourspiritualtruth.com