Posted in Authentic Freedom, Authentic Freedom Book, Being Human, Freedom, Inspiration, Lessons, self-actualization, Spiritual Practices

When Our Fears Come Back to Haunt Us

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Image Credit –

The purpose of the human journey is growth. We grow physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually.  Physical growth and aspects of mental(cognitive) growth are automatic.  In order to grow emotionally, psychologically and spiritually, we need engagement – both from outside of us and from within ourselves.  On many levels, emotional, psychological and spiritual growth is a matter of choice.  We choose if and how we want to support ourselves in this growth and what kind of help we are willing to receive in support of that growth.

When we choose to say YES to the opportunity for emotional, psychological and spiritual growth, the journey is limitless. There are forever opportunities for growth and we always have a choice as to whether or not we want to accept that growth.  An ENORMOUS part of this kind of growth is facing and moving through our fears and the unhealed wounds that are the cause of these fears. There are two ways in which these fears come up for us and two ways to find healing and release for these fears.

Fear comes up for us each and every day. Fears about money, food, clothing, shelter.  Fears about our place in the world, our purpose, our search for fulfillment.  Fears about taking action and fears around feeling powerless.  Fear of rejection and not being loved or having a place of belonging.  Fears of not knowing our path, our purpose, how to find guidance and direction in our lives.  And the fear that we are alone.  These fears come up for us each and every day.  Our job is to identify them (which isn’t always easy), and then find ways to move through these fears, sometimes healing them along the way.  I developed Authentic Freedom specifically for this purpose.  For more on a proactive approach for dealing with fear, read my book, or take my online class.


The other way fear shows up is as part of an organic process by which we are being transformed from within – a process by which we are being filled with love and light and as we are being filled with this love and light, our fears and unhealed wounds are being pushed out. It was exactly this kind of fear that showed up for me this past week.  I suddenly found myself face to face with a parade of the fears that I return to again and again and again for healing and release – fears about money, fears about my purpose, fears about my direction in my life, doubting the path I’m on and wondering if it really is time to “get that real job.”  Also in that cesspool of fears is the one that taunts me for having been “irresponsible” and that suggests I might really be crazy.”  UGH!

This is the darkness I spoke about in yesterday’s blog. Darkness that feels impenetrable.  Darkness that feels like FOREVER.  Darkness that feels like it will never end and that there is NO WAY OUT.  As I found myself writhing in agony in this darkness, letting the fears and relentless taunting thoughts of my mind confuse and overwhelm me, I had no choice but to WALLOW in it.  There was no way to push through it.  No way to make it go away.  My only choice was to SURRENDER to the darkness, ACCEPT its presence and let it have its way with me.  THIS is where the HEALING took place.  After surrendering to the fears, and letting them have their way with me…..they simply went away.  And then it hit me…..DUH!  These fears were not FOREVER.  Neither was the darkness.  Instead, in exactly the same way as I experience it while receiving a Reiki treatment, and as my clients experience it, the fears were surfacing, not because I was truly afraid, but because they were passing through my consciousness as they were on their WAY OUT.  They were surfacing as a result of healing energy that had been filling me and finding their way out.  What I perceived as darkness was really my fears saying “goodbye.”

What tools are you using to support yourself in moving through and healing your fears?

Posted in creativity, God, Inspiration, Mystics

Mystics, Madwomen and a Rock and Roll God

The journey of the Soul, I have learned, comes in fits and starts.  Sometimes seemingly stagnant, sometimes dead and lying in the grave, sometimes dancing naked in the streets – a journey that we want like heck to control, but one we must instead learn to surrender to.  After taking a huge step forward yesterday by moving through one of my biggest fears (public speaking), I found myself writing poetry again.  Who knew that this was what was waiting for me to get over myself?  I’m sharing one of the fun poems that came out of yesterday’s creative burst.  After playing with this poem, ask yourself, “What is lying in wait for me when I move through that next big fear?????”  (PS  Thank you Rob Zombie, Motley Crue and Disturbed for being today’s muse!)


Rock and Roll God

You may have your god in flowing white robes, hands in pious prayer, basking in his golden hue.

My God wears black leather,

With long, flowing hair,

An electric guitar strapped across his chest,

Pounding out tunes and serenading me with:


“Shout, Shout, Shout at the Devil”


“Living Dead-Girl”

While calling me forth from my grave.

copyright 2013  Lauri Ann Lumby