Posted in world changes

Building the New World

We have arrived! Our journey of Ascension is complete. We have pierced through the veil of perceived separation (duality) and have arrived fully in the new/original world. In the new/original world, we know we are all One – one within ourselves, one with what we might call “God,” one with each other, one with all of creation, one with the entire Universe. We are all one! We now know this to be true and if we don’t quite know it fully, we are moving toward this awareness/knowing/experience that I am in you and you are in me and together we are One.

Now that we have completed the journey toward Oneness, it is time for the next leg of our journey. The next stage in this magnificent and magical time of human evolution is to take what we know about Oneness and apply it to our world. It is time to start building our new/original world! As the world of separation and fear continues in its journey of self-destruction, the new and original world is in the process of being born – a world rooted in love, working for harmony and peace where the needs of all are abundantly met not only for survival but that we might all find joyful fulfillment in the human experience, and where each and every living being is honored as sacred and as a necessary part of our life experience.

Earth Heart

While the invitation to building a new world might sound daunting, it is really quite simple. Building a new world is not about taking on corporate giants, beating down institutional establishments or waging war with anyone or anything. Instead, building the new world starts with ourselves. Building the new world begins with the work of transcending the separation within ourselves, letting go of the voices of fear and heeding only the voice of our Soul. Building the new world is about bringing peace to the war within our minds between our heads and our hearts and letting our Souls take wing.

When we bring together the perceived separation within ourselves, bringing ourselves out of fear and into LOVE, then we have no choice but to live the life our Soul intended – one in which we are free to harness our own unique giftedness and the unique way in which we have been gifted to find meaning and purpose in our lives and in doing so helping to serve the betterment of our world.

The magic in accomplishing WHOLENESS within ourselves is that we have already succeeded in building a new world for ourselves – a world in which our life experience is markedly different than the one we knew while living in fear. As we enjoy the magic of Wholeness, the magic begins to rub off on those around us. Soon, they begin to ask the questions that will lead them to wholeness within themselves and with us as an example (and a source of support and encouragement), they are emboldened and empowered in their journey and soon their world is made anew….and so on….and so on…..and so on.   The bottom line is that LOVE is contagious and the more we live as love, the more others will follow, then suddenly, one day, TODAY perhaps, the whole world will have turned from fear toward love and all of creation will be living in the new/original world.

Thank you for all the hard work you have already done helping to get us to this place. We would not be here without your diligent efforts and persistent attention to your own journey of transformation and to your higher intention for a world living in peace.

Congratulations on a job well done. Welcome to the New World. And thank you for your part in continuing to build the world anew!





Authentic Freedom Academy provides programs and services that support us in piercing through the veil of separation so that we might find Oneness within ourselves – empowering us to transcend the fears that are preventing us from living the life of our dreams. 


Posted in 6D, Divine Revelation, End of the World Prophecies, Healing, Inspiration, Magic, Mystics, world changes

Do Not Be Afraid

BIG CHANGES are coming into our world- everyone seems to know it and are feeling it. Just yesterday I shared a blog post with my Facebook community that heralds these BIG CHANGES and speaks of some of the potential consequences of these changes. (here is the post: I have to admit, I was a little bit shocked when reading this blog to find their predictions of financial market collapse echoing the very words I hesitatingly shared with my children just the day before, “I don’t want it to happen this way, but I have a feeling there might be a collapse in the financial markets. With China having issues, I have to wonder.”

I don’t share this blog post or my curiosity about financial market collapse to trigger your fears. Instead, I am posting this blog today as a source of encouragement and support and to assure you NOT TO BE AFRAID because if you are reading this blog (and sharing it with your friends), you are NOT the ones who will experience the BIG CHANGES as devastating. Instead, as the changes unfold, you will experience a great sense of relief, excitement and joyful anticipation because THIS IS WHAT YOU CAME HERE FOR.


(If you find this blog meaningful, consider making a donation to Authentic Freedom Academy in support of all we freely offer, including this blog.  Donation button on the right! Thank you!)

For our entire lives, we have been preparing for this. We have done the (sometimes) excruciatingly painful work of expunging the fear and perceived separation from our consciousness so that we could remember our original Divine nature as LOVE. In this great work we have broken every rule of Western society to follow the truth that has been guiding (HOUNDING) us through our hearts. We have left careers that were no longer life-giving in pursuit of our truth, often at great financial risk. We have shown up again and again and again as harbingers of LOVE and vessels of peace, in service to humanity – more specifically, to a vision of a kinder, gentler, more loving and harmonious world. And in this work, we have suffered – physical pain and exhaustion, emotional collapse, anxiety, depression, financial hardship, and rejection – rejection from those afraid of the change they intuitively know us to be bringing forth. THIS is what we came here for and WE ARE READY to step fully into our roles as teachers, healers, visionaries, prophets, leaders, servants, counselors, missionaries, administrators, builders, gods and goddesses in the creation of the new world – the world that is not new to us because for a lifetime this world has lived in our heart. We already see it. We know it. We live in it. Therefore, the creation of the new world, for those of us who have been doing the work, will be effortless and filled with ease (including lots of time for creativity and play!).


Such, however, will not be the case for those who currently “hold the gold.” This is where the devastation lies. To those who have made their gold through fear, power and control, these changes will SEEM catastrophic, but only to the extent that they are clinging to what they have known – their positions of status, power, wealth, privilege, etc. For as the Buddha reminds, it is only our attachment that causes suffering. We can already see the symptoms of this devastation and it is happening on every front – government, judicial, banking, agriculture, commercial trade, manufacturing, medicine, education, religion. Every institution that was founded on a hierarchical, unholy masculine (not to be confused with the HOLY MASCULINE which is currently being reborn in our world) model based in fear, power and control is in the midst of collapse and they know it but are in deep denial over the reality facing them. They are afraid and their fear is coming out sideways in rash decisions, ridiculous policies, violence, projections of blame, etc. etc. etc. We need look no further than the current presidential race, funded solely by corporate interests, to see the evidence of a system in the state of complete collapse. When Kanye West thinks he would make a good president how can we take any of it seriously?


We don’t. The system collapse is none of our business – except to be a source of hospice and support for a system that is dying, and to be a source of encouragement and healing for those who will wake up because of the collapse. They will be needing tools for grieving the loss of what they have known and resources for finding the new life in the midst of the systemic death. THIS IS WHAT WE CAME HERE TO DO – first for ourselves (which we have already successfully done!), and then because of the expertise we have gained in doing this for ourselves, we are now ready to help show others the way.

So, DO NOT BE AFRAID as you watch the BIG CHANGES as they happen around you, because ultimately, these changes are not for you. They are only for you to the extent that they are clearing the surface on which the NEW WORLD will be built and if you are reading this blog, YOU are the builders of this new world and OUR time is NOW!


(If you found this blog meaningful, consider making a donation to Authentic Freedom Academy in support of all we freely offer, including this blog.  Donation button on the right! Thank you!)




Posted in Authentic Freedom, Lessons, Spiritual Practices, Virtual Church

Sunday Service – The Price of Freedom

On Sunday, August 23, 2015, we hosted our second Sunday Service at Inner Sun Yoga Studio, Oshkosh.  It was a stormy, rainy morning and we appreciated the opportunity to gather together to share in a common desire to be vessels through which love, peace and harmony are made real in our world and to participate in tearing down the walls of perceived separation between us.  Here is the audio recording of the teaching portion of our gathering:

Please join us this coming Sunday, August 30, 2015 for our weekly Sunday Service.  The theme this week is healing the fears within us that lead us to our compulsive behaviors (greed, sloth, pride, envy, etc.).  We will be using the principles and practices of Authentic Freedom to facilitate this learning!  Looking forward to journeying with you on Sunday!


Posted in End of the World Prophecies, Inspiration, Mystics, world changes

Love Invasion – We’re HERE!

Today’s blog is inspired by an auto-correct incident with my HTC-1 Android phone (Thank you Verizon!).  I was typing my name into a text message and my phone autocorrected it to “INVASION.”  First I laughed.  How do you get “invasion” from Lauri Lumby?   Then I wondered, is this a message from the gods?  Are “they” coming – aliens from another race, other galaxies, other planets?  I found myself drawn to images of movies like Poltergeist, Independence Day, Close Encounters, etc.  Then I thought about my wish and hope in the midst of the ever-hastening collapse of Western civilization for the “Mothership” to come and take me away.  Was this a message that she is on her way?  Are the Pleidians, the Sirians, the Arcturians, those from Orion, Neptune, Pluto, coming to save us? 


Then it struck me – there is no “they”.  There are no aliens coming.  The Mothership is not coming to rescue us.  Not because we don’t deserve it, but because we don’t need it.  WE ARE THE MOTHERSHIP!  WE are the ones who will rescue Western civilization from its current path of self-destruction.  We do not come from other planets or other civilizations (though it may seem like we do).  We are right here, walking among you, in human flesh.  We have been here all along, quietly carrying the mission of love in our hearts.  But, now it is time that we are known.  It is time for us to step forth from behind the veil and into the light of day so that all may know – WE ARE HERE.  We are here and INVADING the world with LOVE.  It is a love invasion….and WE ARE HERE.  In case you haven’t met us….here’s who we are:

  • We are those who desire a world rooted in love, working for peace.
  • We are those who believe we are all ONE – that there is no separation between us and that “divisions” such as race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, nationality, culture, etc. are simply those things that make us special and unique and are qualities to value as sacred and holy and something we desire to know and understand about each other.
  • We are those who believe the earth is a place to be treated as sacred.  We understand that the earth is what feeds, nourishes, clothes and feeds us and that without a healthy and whole planet, we will soon perish.
  • We are those who believe in a world that is abundant and that there is enough to feed, clothe and house all the world if we would simply learn how to protect our resources, take only what we need and share with our fellow human beings so that all may have what they need not only to survive, but also to thrive.
  • We are the ones who believe that every single human being is a sacred and holy expression of love and deserves to be treated with honor and respect.
  • We are the ones who put healthy food, safety, quality healthcare and quality education first and believe these are the inherent rights of every citizen of our planet – to have good food and clean water, to feel safe in their home and in their lands, to enjoy quality healthcare and an education.
  • We are the ones who support a global mission.  We are ONE planet.  One people.  One humanity and our minds and hearts must be attuned to the needs of the all. When one of us suffers, we all suffer.  Toward this end, we look to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights as a tool to guide us.
  • We are the ones looking for peace instead of war, understanding instead of conflict, healing instead of retaliation.  We seek to heal and soothe the fears that cause people to act violently and we seek to support the evolution of humankind into just that – HUMAN+KIND.


In short: We are here to usher in a NEW WORLD – a world that is rooted in love, working for the benefit of all of humanity, serving the cause of peace, healing a fearful and wounded world, bringing all of humanity into a state of UNITY where everyone’s needs are being met and where each person is given the opportunity to reach their greatest potential.

The Love Invasion is here.  We are here.  And because of our love,  the world will never be the same.

If you have always felt that you are here for a reason, that you feel called to change the world, that you desire a world of love and not of fear, then you are part of the Love Invasion.  If you are in the Oshkosh (Fox Valley) area, please join us for our weekly Superhero Gatherings where you will find a supportive community and resources to help you to live that call to be LOVE in the world.  Learn more HERE. 


Posted in Divine Revelation, Empowerment, End of the World Prophecies, Freedom, Inspiration, Mystics, Oneness with God, Superheroes, teachers, world changes

The World is Finally Ready for Us – Superhero Report

Welcome to this week’s Superhero Report – a summary of the material and process covered at this week’s gathering of the Superhero Academy.  The theme this week is:  THE TIME FOR CHANGE IS NOW!  The world is finally ready for us to help heal and change the world.  And the healing….starts within ourselves.

(Please note, starting January 1, 2015, the Superhero Report, Agape’ Meditation Newsletter and Authentic Freedom Virtual Church services will be available by subscription only.  With the subscription, you receive all three for about the price of your weekly cappuccino.  Click HERE to subscribe, or use the Paypal link below.  Thank you)

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The Time is NOW!

If the flood of tears that has been coursing through my body this week (and the bodies of other sensitives I know) are any indication…..the world is on the brink of ENORMOUS change!  ENORMOUS change that I cannot even begin to describe and even if I had words for it, I don’t think they would do the change justice.  What I feel is a palpable, tangible, almost touchable mass, just outside our reach, but moving closer….or should I say it is just below the surface ready to EXPLODE!??  When I approach this mass, all I feel is a profound and overwhelming feeling of love….a love that is so big it is almost difficult to be near it….and maybe this is the cause for the tears.  What human can be in the presence of this kind of love?  Every kind of human – that’s who – when we allow ourselves to be freed and released of our own sense of unworthiness and the fears that arise out of this unworthiness.  Getting worthy is what the change is asking us to do….and the time for getting worthy is NOW!

Getting Worthy

Getting worthy is not about appeasing some sort of angry, fickle, judgmental God.  No, getting worthy is about REMEMBERING the love that we already are and the love that we NEVER stopped being.  We are love…..always have been.  We just forgot.  And it is this forgetting that is the cause of the fear and suffering of the human condition.  And we are TIRED.  Tired of living in FEAR.  And the rest of the world is TIRED too!  This is where we come in.  Many of us (probably all who are reading this blog) have been doing the long, slow, sometimes treacherous work of UNRAVELING from fear….of remembering the love that we are and the love we always have been.  As we have been unraveling and remembering, we have been healed and transformed.  Transformed for what??????  To help make the world anew.  And the great news is that the world is finally ready for us.  Critical mass has been accomplished (think….”hundredth monkey”).  The world is TIRED of living in fear and is LONGING for a world that is rooted in something other than fear, manipulation and control.  The world is longing to feel worthy as we have allowed ourselves to feel worthy.


Here’s How it Works

The change starts with us – taking responsibility for our own woundedness, anxieties, insecurities, compulsions, and fears.  Then, doing the work of healing and transforming these fears, etc. through mindfulness practices, prayer, creativity practices, healing protocols, etc.   Then….as we grow in our knowledge of the love that we are….that love ripples out into the world through us….waking people up and healing and changing the world.  The world is changed simply by our PRESENCE.  When we are love, others remember the love they are and either stay and grow in the knowledge of their own love….or they run away in fear.  And as we REMEMBER the love we are, we no longer take their running away as personal…..we allow them their fear and trust they will eventually find their way home.  It really is this simple.  We change…..and the world changes with us.

Really Good News for the Superheroes

And here is the really good news……the work that we have been doing is itself transforming.  What used to feel like WORK and used to be a struggle… suddenly becoming EASY.  Easy meaning WITH EASE.  The struggle is OVER.  No more is the work about fighting, or working hard, or making it happen, or striving, or pursuing, or accomplishing, or cajoling, or sacrifice, or suffering, or martyrdom, or PAIN, or AGONY.  Instead….it is about ease.  As Isaiah once said, “every mountain and hill shall be made low,” and they have been.  The tough work is over….the rest is to simply continue…continue remembering love and turning away from fear so that the world itself can be remembered into the love that it always has been and was intended to be.

The time is now… turn our own world from fear into love and in doing so, watching the rest of the world change with us!

If you found this meaningful and would like to continue receiving the Superhero Report, along with the Agape’ meditation newsletter and Authentic Freedom Virtual Church service, please subscribe HERE. 

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Posted in Discernment, Empowerment, Superheroes, Truth, world changes

Superheroes Among Us

Bad Buys, Victims and Superheroes

There are three kinds of people in the world:

  • Those who seek after power and control, manipulating through intimidation and fear.
  • Those who are manipulated and controlled, victimized by their fear.
  • Those who move through their fear, seeking and working for a world ruled by love.

In the world of comic books, the “bad guys” make up the first kind of people – your Lex Luthors, Penguins, Jokers, Green Goblins, Skeletors, Boris and Natashas, Shegos, Drakkens, Mojo Jojos, etc.  The towns people, people of Gotham City, Metropolis, etc. make up the second group – those victimized by the bad guys.  And it is the Superheroes – Wonder Woman, Kim Possible, Batman, Superman, Spiderman, the Teen Titans, etc. who save the day, restoring peace, harmony and justice to the world.


Real World Bad Guys and Superheroes

The real world, in many ways, is no different than the comic book world.  There are “bad guys” ruling the world through intimidation and fear, those who suffer under the power and control tactics of the “bad guys,” and those who want to do something about it in an effort to restore justice, peace and harmony to the world.  Superheroes are real and they are living and walking among us – many of them just trying to wake up to their gifts and their call. If you are reading this blog, it is likely that YOU are one of the Superheroes!

We Have Come to Save the Day!

If you are one of the Superheroes, on some level, YOU KNOW IT! And you know it in the following ways:

  • A frustration, impatience, angst, maybe even rage over the current state of the world.
  • Inside of you, you know of a better world – a world ruled by love, lived out in peace, harmony, justice, collaborative leadership, tolerance and acceptance.
  • There is something inside of you that YEARNS for the world you know in your heart, and you feel compelled to do something about it, though perhaps you feel overwhelmed by the task and alone in your vision.
  • You may have struggled to find a place of belonging in this world.  Between the “bad guys” and those paralyzed by fear and complacent within the status quo, you often wonder where you fit in.
  • The traditional models of education, government, medicine, religion, etc. don’t work for you.
  • Perhaps you have tried to share your vision and your gifts and been ridiculed, condemned, or maybe even punished for trying to speak your truth.
  • You may have struggled with anxiety, depression, panic attacks, sensitivity issues (environmental, food, etc.) (which are all actually symptoms of your SOUL trying to wake you up to your Superpowers!)

If any of the above speaks to you, you are most likely a SUPERHERO and the time of your awakening is NOW!


Come join us!

If you are in the Oshkosh area, and you think you might be a Superhero, please join us on:

Monday, July 7th at 4:30 pm

for an initial gathering of the Superheroes.  From there we will map out a plan for how often and when we will gather for:





In our gatherings, we will:

  • Look at the unique gifts and call of the New Superheroes
  • Learn how to manage the anxiety, depression, panic and unique sensitivities that often accompany this call.
  • Utilize mindfulness and creativity tools for discovering, nurturing and cultivating your Superpowers.
  • Explore the ways in which you are called to use your unique gifts.

WonderWomanFor more information, click HERE, or call or email Lauri Lumby (aka Wonder Woman) at (920) 230-1313,




Posted in Being Human, Divine Revelation, Inspiration, world changes

Are You One of the Heaven Sent?

In yesterday’s blog, I wrote about and described those I called, “The Different Ones.”  I wasn’t really comfortable with this terminology, but chose it for lack of a better word.  Yesterday, a much better word revealed itself, “Heaven-Sent.”  Heaven-Sent more clearly described my understanding of “the different ones,” and in today’s blog, I invite you to ask yourself, “Am I one of the Heaven-Sent?”  (hint, if you are reading this blog, the answer is most likely “yes!” 🙂  )



As sons and daughters of God, created in God’s own image, each and everyone of us is heaven-sent.  There are some among us, however, who in addition to being heaven-sent, are Heaven-Sent.  All of us are sent here to play an important and significant role in the manifestation of God’s desire to create heaven on earth, and to be a vehicle through which God is expressing God’s self.  Some, however, have been sent to participate in this endeavor in a more directed way.  The Heaven-Sent don’t look any different than any other human being and you might not be able to spot one in a crowd…..but then again you might.  The Heaven-Sent possess within them a power and an energy which his magnetic and in a very quiet way, does draw your attention.  I know one Heaven-Sent who used to work the checkout line at one of our local grocery stores.  Simply by a look in her eyes, people were drawn to her.  Her lines were always the longest with folks urgent to be the recipient of her smile and her kind words.  Simply being near her made people feel good.  She is definitely one of the Heaven-Sent!!!

Are You One of the Heaven Sent?

Again, if you are reading this blog, you are likely one of the Heaven-Sent, but in case you have forgotten, it is my job to remind you.  This is how you will know that you are Heaven-Sent.  Keep reading and find out what you are supposed to do with that!

  • The Heaven-Sent possess a deep inner knowing, passion, even restlessness related to their Divine Call.
  • The Heaven-Sent possess a knowledge of how the world is supposed to be.  They LONG for a loving, harmonious, peaceful planet where the earth and all her inhabitants are lovingly cared for and they absolutely KNOW that what they envision is not only possible but critical.
  • The Heaven-Sent know that they have a role to play in manifesting this vision.  They might not yet know what that role is, but they yearn to know it and do it.
  • The Heaven-Sent have a passion for the well being of all of creation and don’t understand why others don’t possess this same passion.
  • The Heaven-Sent are extremely uncomfortable with the systems, organizations, structures of the world which stand in the way of creating and manifesting this vision of a loving and peaceful planet where all beings are being lovingly cared for.
  • The Heaven-Sent do not understand the current societal paradigms which seem to separate people by race, gender, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, etc.  They feel that all people are precious and glorious in the unique way that God made them and find themselves offended, even heartbroken when people are treated in any other way.
  • The Heaven-Sent have a deep love of the planet and are horrified to see what humans have done to decimate our world, destroying the natural harmony of the earth, poisoning our foods, tainting our water, etc.
  • The Heaven-Sent are vehemently opposed to violent means of settling conflict.  They believe in the ultimate good of humankind and the ability to resolve conflict in peaceful and loving ways.
  • In short, the Heaven-Sent are here to CHANGE THE WORLD.

You Have Been Called

If you believe that you are one of the Heaven-Sent, then it is your job to respond to this inner call and will find yourself dissatisfied until you do.  If you are one of the Heaven-Sent, here is a formula which will help you to heed that call, to learn your own unique role and to do something about it.

  • Set time aside in your life to BE QUIET.  Be still and LISTEN for the quiet voice of truth within that’s only desire is to reveal to you your unique role in bringing forth a new world.
  • Once you have begun to identify your calling, your ego will begin to fight against you.  Resistance and fear will emerge.  Your job is to find effective tools for transcending and overcoming these fears so that you can accomplish the mission you were sent here to do. (Hint…..I can help you with this part).
  • As you are accomplishing the above, seek out others of the Heaven-Sent.  Simply tell the Universe that you want to meet others like you, and you will.  You will recognize them through their eyes and through a sense of energetic resonance and recognition.
  • Begin to gather.  Get together with the Heaven-Sent that you have met.  Set time aside to gather together for quiet reflection.  In this quiet reflection, you will receive guidance on how you are to further work toward bringing forth the new world. As you gather, you might also decide to “pray” for the well-being of the planet, for the manifestation of the new world, for an increase in love.  I think of this part as simply deciding together to imagine the world bathed in love or to “send” love our into the world.

Now here’s a little secret:   your call might be as simple as this….to send the planet love……there might not be any battles to win, any structures to tear down, any institutions to crumble…simply being and sending love might be just enough to change our planet from fear to love.

If you are one of the Heaven-Sent and are looking for support in discerning and exercising your call, I am available for one-on-one mentoring.  Call (920) 230-1313 or email to schedule an appointment.  And if you are in the Oshkosh area, please email me with your interest and contact information as the Heaven-Sent of Oshkosh will soon be gathering. 

Posted in Authentic Freedom, creativity, Inspiration, Mystics, shame, world changes

For Those Not of This World – Releasing Shame

Today’s blog is targeted for those of you (us), who have often felt a misfit in this world.  Freaks, geeks, dweebs, artists, creative geniuses, rightbrain thinkers, lightworkers, healers, Indigo’s, Crystals, Rainbows, Starseeds, lightwarriors, children of light. Whatever name we have called ourselves, we have always felt as if we stand outside the norm, as if we do not fit in, and that no matter how hard we try, we cannot embrace the lifestyle, expectations, and values of the hierarchical, patriarchal, materialistic, consumeristic, Western world.  Instead, we find ourselves embracing what many would consider countercultural values and lifestyles and either working seventeen jobs or becoming (as one friend recently observed about me) “chronically self-employed,”  in order to live our truth and follow our dreams.  Some, familiar with the Matrix movies might suggest that we have taken “the red pill.”  Others, might just shake their head in disgust as we continue to rock the boat of “normal,” challenge perceived authority, and shake the foundations of status quo, even though the work that we do is ALWAYS geared toward making the world a more loving, harmonious, peaceful and beautiful place.  But, people don’t like change and they don’t appreciate different, so we are often cast out as weird or condemned as shit-disturbers.  If any of this sounds familiar to you, keep reading because I am about to offer you the ONE CURE for all your frustration and impatience over simply trying to be who God/dess made you to be and the ONE CURE for any obstacle you might be facing in living your truth freely and enjoying the abundant fruits of sharing your amazing gifts. 

Releasing Shame
Releasing Shame


The ONE CURE came to me in my own struggle to live my truth and trying to find my place in the world.  I have to thank my friend who first called me “chronically self-employed,” and the completely disproportionate reaction I had to these words as it gave me an opportunity to identify THE ONE CAUSE of my history of paralysis, lack of confidence, immobility, perceived failure, financial lack, vocational and relational struggles.  The ONE CAUSE, I discovered, was shame.  “What is wrong with me that I cannot work in the real world and have a real job?” I moaned.  “What was wrong with me that I couldn’t be content in an unhappy marriage?”  (millions of other people find a way to be).  “Why doesn’t anybody get what I do or understand who I am?”  I realized at the root of all these questions was ONE emotion, and that emotion was SHAME.  I felt shame for being different and for seemingly not fitting in and for feeling driven to live a life outside the norm by naming, claiming, cultivating and living my gifts and my dreams.


Once I was able to identify SHAME as the cause, I knew I had also found the cure.  If shame is what is keeping me small and stuck, then shame needed to be confronted, transformed and released.  Intellectually, I knew there was nothing wrong with me and there was no rational reason that I should remain stuck.  But shame, as an underlying inner state, trumped all I “knew” in my mind.  So, I applied one of my favorite spiritual practices to shame and allowed it to find its release.

Releasing Shame

If you find that shame is also at the root of your own tendency to remain small, or believing that you are different and in your difference, somehow wrong, then try this practice which I am borrowing from Tibetan Buddhism – Tonglen.

1) Connect with your feelings of being different or not fitting in.

2) Identify the emotion underlying these feelings – perhaps it is shame.

3) Become aware of where you are feeling this emotion in your body.

4) Allow yourself to be present to this emotion.  FEEL it, instead of pushing it away.

5) Breathe in this feeling.  Breathe it into your heart as you allow yourself to feel the feeling.

6) Breathe out love.

7) Breathe in the feeling and breathe out love until you feel something in you shift.  Maybe a new feeling surfaces, or you begin to cry, or you feel yourself growing stronger, more confident, more self-assured. Stay with this practice until you feel it is resolved.

Why This Practice Works

Once you have released the shame, you can no longer remain small or have feelings of being rejected or condemned, or experience failure, because, there is nothing left for these negative experiences to hook on to.  Before, shame acted like a cement block that we were tied to with thick, black straps of elastic.  Every time we tried to crawl out of our feelings around being different, and every time we tried to “think” ourselves to greatness, all it would take was one crossed eye, or shaking finger of criticism to pull us right back into the pit of our shame.  Once shame is released, there is nothing left for the hooks to hang on to… we are free.  The proof in this practice is that once we release the shame, every door that was previously closed to us miraculously opens because we can no longer be rejected, condemned, ostracized or banished because there is no more shame to hold us hostage within ourselves, and then we are free to be our weird, creative, countercultural, shit-disturbing selves and we are happier (and maybe even richer) for it.

Lauri Lumby provides one-on-one mentoring for those seeking to birth their Soul – the uniquely creative part of themselves through which they were gifted to find meaning, purpose and fulfillment and through which they are called to contribute to the betterment of the world.  To learn more call (920) 230-1313 or email

Posted in Relationships, Spiritual Practices

The Path to Dialogue with guest blogger John Backman

Today’s blog comes to us from author and writer, John Backman.  John Backman’s new book is Why Can’t We Talk? Christian Wisdom on Dialogue as a Habit of the Heart (SkyLight Paths Publishing). As a blogger for Huffington Post Religion and an associate of an Episcopal monastery, he writes extensively on contemplative spirituality and its ability to help us dialogue across divides. His website is located at

The Best Path to Dialogue Is Through Your Deepest Self

If you read Lauri’s blog for any length of time, you will have all the resources you need to talk with—and listen to—the annoying relative at Thanksgiving dinner. Or the neighbor who voted for the candidate you loathe. Or the faithful believer from the religion you abandoned years ago.

Does that seem hard to believe?

You might think the gulf is too wide, and no one would blame you for that. When we encounter people who disagree with us, our gut leads us toward anger, defensiveness, self-protection, fear, or some combination thereof. More often than not, we shy away from those who disagree with us, or we angrily state our opinion and brook no dissent.

Some of this comes straight from our DNA. Fight or flight, after all, is built into our status as creatures on this planet. But our culture has taught us well too. Black-and-white thinking inhibits dialogue and even casts it as irrelevant. (Why dialogue with anyone when you already know The Truth?) Too many pundits and radio hosts would rather shout than talk. The structure of our media reduces complex, difficult social issues to sound bites and platitudes. Elected officials, all too often, model how not to dialogue with others.

Behind these obstacles to dialogue are entrenched systems that we cannot change on our own. So why not start with the one thing we can change—ourselves?

Oneness Transforms Us…

This, I think, is where God comes in. We can change ourselves by ourselves, but overall, we’re not very good at it. (For evidence of this, think weight loss programs.) We do better with help—and who better to help than the One who can change us permanently, thoroughly, from the inside out? How better to access help than to seek Oneness with this One?

Oneness with God—or, rather, participation in our Oneness with God—has fueled the journeys of saints and mystics for millennia. An experience of this union brings us unutterable bliss, joy, and love. But it does something else too: it changes who we are.

I first experienced this soon after undergoing a born-again experience in my teens. By the end of three days, not only was a long bout of depression lifting, but as I told a friend with some consternation, “I’m starting to love people I can’t stand! That’s not my style!”

The experience of Oneness comes from a mutual opening. As we open our hearts to God, God opens the divine heart to us. And we start to “look like God.” Have you ever noticed how long-married couples start to resemble each other, or how the opinions of our closest friends “rub off” on us? This is what happens here. When we foster our own personal connection with God, we gradually begin to reflect God. We begin to desire compassion and connection above all else—because God desires them above all else.

These are precisely the virtues that make dialogue possible. As they become part of our souls, we move beyond the practice of dialogue and become people of dialogue at our very core. Dialogue and its prerequisites—curiosity, compassion, attentiveness, listening—flow from within us.

…and We Start to Listen

When that happens, we stop marshaling our counterarguments while pretending to listen to our neighbor blather on about his candidate. Instead, perhaps for the first time, we truly hear what he says and think, “I wonder how he got there?” Our children can dig in their heels about getting a tattoo and we want to ask, “Why is this important to you? I really want to know.”

Nothing about this inner transformation means that we will automatically agree with our adversaries, or that we will “win them over to our side.” What does happen is that issues of agreement or “winning over” become irrelevant. The other’s well-being, and our relationship with that person, become more important.

The process of reaching out from this deepest self feeds upon itself. In many cases, “a soft answer turns away wrath” (Proverbs 15:1), so when we communicate curiosity and compassion, our adversary responds in kind—or at least dials down the intensity. The more we hear the perspectives of others in this way, the more we come to realize that our perspective is one among billions, and that other points of view might be just as valid as ours. That redoubles our curiosity about those other perspectives, and we delve deeper into dialogue.

A Matter of Time—and Practice

Rarely, if ever, does this happen in an instant. It is why, instead of the single word conversion to describe the process, I prefer the Benedictine phrase conversion of life: it implies a slow, daily turning of our deepest selves toward God. We draw toward Oneness one day at a time, one step at a time.

In the process, we draw closer to reconciliation across the divides that plague us—not necessarily to agreement, but to a commitment to greater wisdom and one another’s humanity above all.

How do we get there?

The Oneness is real. Our job is to enter into it. Most faith traditions include spiritual practices that, over the millennia, have been shown to foster our drawing closer to God. Seek out the practices in your tradition and try them out. Or find the practices that resonate with you and make them a daily practice. Daily practice is the best way to open ourselves to the daily shaping of our souls that is conversion of life.

THANK YOU JOHN for this beautiful post.  It is a great lesson for all of us……me included.  😉

Posted in guilt, shame

Shame and Guilt – What’s it? Who’s it?

Guilt and shame are two words that when uttered,  just might make your skin crawl.  What is the difference between guilt and shame and how do they act as sources of growth in our spiritual journey?

Divorce is never an easy thing and the journey is everything but easy and smooth.  For me, the last two months, especially have been difficult emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  In particular,  I find myself short of temper, hyper-sensitive, impatient, angry, resentful, needy and even a little bit paranoid.   The perfectionist in me is not ok with all these chaotic negative emotions and I feel bad for my husband and children who have had to bear the brunt of the pain within my own being that is finding its way out sideways through projection, impatience, etc.  It is in these moments that I am grateful for the supportive experts that I have welcome as sources of support as I move through this process.  Yesterday I met with one of those sources of support and as I shared with her (vented actually) all the things I have been feeling, she posed the following question to me: “Are you feeling guilty?”

Guilty?  Now, that came out of nowhere.  Why in the world would I feel guilty about any of this?  While my first inclination was to say, “No, of course I’m not feeling guilty….this is exactly what we are supposed to be doing and I know that in the end it will be for the highest good of all of us.”  But then, a tiny place within me whispered, “LIAR!”   So while I could not immediately own guilt in the context of this divorce, I knew it was something I needed to explore more fully…, explore I did and here is what I discovered:

GUILTI have to say off the bat that I have a problem with the word guilt.   I have come to embrace the idea of guilt as being nothing but a source of temptation – guilt (in my understanding) is something that comes from outside of us out of the mouth of perceived or self-appointed authorities simply for the sake of keeping us under control.  Guilt is the voice inside me that says, “You had better go to church on Sunday or God will punish you.”  It is also the voice that says, “It is your job to make sure everybody else’s needs are met – you must sacrifice your truth, your gifts, your needs for the sake of others – afterall, that is what a good wife and a good Christian would do.”  As I have grown spiritually, I have found these voices to be a source of sabatoge – keeping me from hearing, embracing and living the truth that the Divine would have me know and ignoring my own needs for support, boundaries, creative space, etc.   I have been heard to say to my students and clients, “Guilt is the Devil.”  And in the role of adversary, I have found this to be true.  Guilt does not help us, it harms us.

So, when Rhiannon invited me to explore the question of guilt, I had a hard time coming up with a response.  But then, as I sat with the question, I had a vision of another word, a word more powerful and devastating and it stepped out in-front of guilt and pushed it aside.  This word is SHAME.

SHAME – ouch! Shame, as I have come to understand it is the natural feeling that arises to tell us that we have done something to hurt another human being.  Shame is what alerts us to our boundaries being infringed upon, or tells us that we are being tempted to give away our power.  Shame has icky, sticky sensations all around it and as much as we like to push it aside, ignore it, deny that we ever feel shame, I firmly believe that the feeling of shame has been given to us as a profoundly helpful tool.

As human beings, we were created to be in community and to be in relationship.  While some of our species are authentically called to be alone, it is challenging to live or exist as a species in complete solitude.  In the call to be in community, we are most healthy when we work toward cultivating harmony, understanding, healthy communication, deep and authentic listening, and work toward looking upon and honoring each and every human being as the magnificent expression of the Divine that they/we are.  The problem is that most of the time we are operating out of our own fears and compulsions and these stand in the way of our ability to cultivate a healthy humanity.  But how do we know when we are sabatoging these goals?  The answer, I believe is SHAME.

Shame, I believe is an interior alarm system given to us by the Divine to alert us to the places where we are not succeeding in the call to live in community –  harmoniously.  When we intentionally or unintentionally hurt another being, we feel shame.  When we are hurt by another, we feel shame.  When we give our power away, we feel shame.  When someone tries to infringe on our own needs and boundaries, we feel shame.  When we ignore the voice of truth within or suppress our own unique magnificence, on some level we feel shame.  Shame is the feeling that guards our needs, our gifts, our magnificence, our safety, our truth.  When looked upon in this light, shame can serve as a remarkable tool for healing when we allow the feeling of shame to be a wakeup call to our own inability to honor our own magnificence or the magnificence of another.

So, when I invite the question of shame to enter into my consciousness, I am forced to humbly admit all those places within that are filled with shame in regards to my childhood, adult years, marriage, pending divorce, parenting, etc. etc. etc.   OUCH!  OUCH OUCH!  The good news is that while I may be tempted to indulge a little self-flagellation, I am more inclined to remember that it is only in naming the demon (this one being shame) that it can be healed and I find comfort in knowing that once the demon has been named 95% of the healing has already taken place. YEA!

What roles do guilt and shame play in your own life?

Is there shame that you are carrying within that is in need of healing and release?

How can you invite a new perspective on guilt and shame that invites your own healing?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries/YourSpiritualTruth