Posted in Authentic Freedom, church, Forgiveness, Healing, Jesus, Lessons, Mary Magdalene, Raised Catholic, Spiritual Practices, teachers

When Old Wounds Come Back to Haunt Us

After Monday’s global message about Building the New World, and yesterday’s call to resurrect the Magdalene and feminine principle with her, I’m turning to a more personal experience, and yet one to which I suspect you can relate and from which we can all learn.

The VOID MOON sucks! After the glow of love that filled our Soul’s at the Blood Moon eclipse, equinox gateway, the intensity of this week’s new moon and the fallout of a moon gone void have been INTENSE.  With the new moon, I had such intense energy within me I thought I might explode, only to meet the following day with DEPRESSION, GRIEF and overwhelming fear….all thanks to old wounds and deeply rooted fears that all decided to pay me a visit.  On the highest level, I know these fears are here to teach me and are only showing up now because they are ready to be healed.  This awareness, however, does not make the fears any less uncomfortable.

Interestingly, these wounds are intimately related to the topics I taught this week in my Authentic Freedom and Mary Magdalene courses, lending support to the idea that the world really is of our own making and for the purpose of our own, personal, evolution. So, here is what decided to show up this week asking for another layer of healing:

MONEY. OMFG! Not even going there!  I’ve been down this road so many times I see the demon and say, “YOU AGAIN!?  Aren’t we done with this dance yet?”  Then I turn to my spiritual practices, say my prayers, borrow from Peter to pay Paul if necessary and then move on.  Then I do the really DEEP work of finding out what is REALLY in the way because, as I keep discovering, it is rarely about MONEY.  Instead, it is about some other wound asking for healing….in the most recent case – the wound over not feeling supported, believing I have to do this all alone, the thought of which then makes me DAMN TIRED. What I really want to do is crawl into bed and sleep for a week, but instead, I see the wound and do my best to care for it, along with the pain in my lower back that always seems to accompany this fear.  If what has happened in the past proves to repeat itself, after tending to the wound and finding relief from this fear, money will once again start flowing toward me….not just away from me!


REJECTION. Blech.  Yesterday is showed up LOUD AND PROUD in my old wounds over the Church.  Hearing firsthand what I have known for many years – people I know and once (and still) cared for saying all kinds of evil against me – evil that has reached all the way into the hierarchy of the Church where there is apparently a growing file with my name on it.  (Based on what I’ve heard, the file must be enormous!).  Part of me wants to ask, “Don’t you people have anything better to do with your time?”  The other part of me just sighs in resignation over the very real truth that both Jesus and Mary Magdalene were treated in the very same way by the institutions and people around them.  So, who am I to mourn over uninformed and hateful comments made against me “in Jesus’ name?”  Another part of me knows that the things being said against me are simply a reflection of the unhealed wound of rejection in those rejecting me and the extent to which I feel rejected by them is the degree to which they fear being rejected by God.

I weep for their fear and pray for their healing….but still it makes me sad.  Sad to know that there are those “out there” speaking evil against me and against the work I am doing in the world.  So I grieve.  I grieve the relationship with the Church I once enjoyed.  I grieve the loss of the dream.  I grieve the hole in my heart where these “friends” once lived.  I grieve for those who don’t even know me and who hold some sort of personal vendetta against me for the sake of their own self-righteousness.  I grieve for a hierarchy who doesn’t know me except through the lens of someone else’s fear.  I grieve for a Church who has lost another valuable resource and all other lost possibilities because of the wholesale exclusion of anything associated with my name.  And I grieve for myself – for the little girl who found her connection with God in the silent experience of the mass, the woman who found her calling through the words of her pastor, who found her formation in the arms of the Church and who wants nothing but to serve God through Jesus by helping the world to know what she has come to know through Jesus’ message of love – that we are all ONE and that we are ONE with each other through LOVE/God.

Mastery Work: Then, when I am done with my grieving, the true mastery work steps in. I see this all for what it really is – AN OPPORTUNITY TO HEAL MY OWN FEAR OF REJECTION!  It is not a coincidence that the “haters” are showing up now as I am about to step into something magnificent.  As I’m being given an opportunity to step even more fully into my Soul’s purpose, here are those rejecting me and me reacting to their rejection by feeling rejected.  The “mastery” work reminds me that everything showing up in our lives is here for our own evolution.  So those who are showing up reflecting back to me the fear of rejection are here as teachers, giving me an opportunity to see the wound that is not yet healed within me so that I can do the work of healing it so that I can take the next BOLD step toward the purpose of my Soul.  Thank you haters!  And here is the prayer that I will be employing to assist myself in healing the fear of rejection and in doing so, helping them find healing for theirs as well:


I’m sorry (to the part of my soul that is feeling rejected)

Please forgive me.

I love you.

Thank you.



Lauri Ann Lumby offers empowerment training for those who want to change their world. To learn more call (920) 230-1313 or email

Posted in Death, Divine Revelation, Inspiration, Lessons, Mystics

Pluto Rising – The Resurrection of Love

NASA’s  New Horizons spacecraft and its journey to Pluto, is an historical event that shouldn’t be missed. (Learn more here on the NASA site: ) For the first time in our human history, we are getting an up-close and personal view of this dwarf planet and its surrounding moons (especially Charon). This is a monumental moment in our history as a scientific and technological accomplishment, but more importantly, bringing Pluto into view is ushering in a significant shift in the consciousness of humanity. This shift is nothing short of the resurrection of love.

Photo credits:  NASA-JHUAP-SWRI
Photo credits: NASA-JHUAP-SWRI

On her site, The Cosmic Path, Stephanie Azaria speaks of the astrological and consciousness significance of our meeting with Pluto. I want to share with you my own thoughts on this arrival from the perspective of my own personal experience working with the Pluto archetype, commonly known as The Lord of the Underworld.
In 2008, while on pilgrimage to Glastonbury, England, I had a profound mystical encounter with Gwynn Ap Nudd – Celtic (specifically Welsh) god of the underworld. I had no idea who Gwynn was and his “arrival” was startling to me and in truth, quite disarming. What did the Celtic god of the underworld (and by association Pluto) have to do with a Catholic-Christian devoted to Jesus? After getting over the shock, I voraciously researched Gwynn and his place within Celtic mythology, what he represents and what he is here to teach us. What I discovered was beyond amazing, especially the symbols associated with Gwynn that had for years spoken to the quiet places within my heart. In many ways, I felt as if I was meeting, for the first time, someone I had known for a very long time. In meeting Gwynn, I felt like I was coming home.

I quickly learned, however, that the arrival of an “underworld god” is not all wine and roses (or in this case, Guinness and Holy Thorn). What I learned is that the underworld god archetype is about coming home, but before we come home, first we have to “die.” The death that is called forth by the underworld gods is the death of the ego – but not through ascension or enlightenment as “upper world gods” would have us do. Instead, the underworld gods teach us how to transcend the ego by confronting our shadow and staring down our fears. While underworld gods have nothing to do with hell (pre-Christian traditions have no hell….they only have the underworld which is a place of restoration and renewal in preparation for the next life to be lived), they are here to accompany us through the hell we have created in our own minds through judgment – specifically of ourselves.

What the ancients knew, that we have forgotten, is that suffering on this plane is rooted in all the ways we have separated ourselves (or been separated from love through childhood conditioning) from the love that we are. Underworld gods (Gwynn Ap Nudd, Cernnunos, Hades, Pluto) are here to bring us through the thorn-covered hedge of our fears, our unhealed wounds, the places within ourselves we have rejected or judged as imperfect, all the while guiding us home to the place where we are able to love ourselves without condition and in loving ourselves, learning to love the world.

Pluto, then, is here to teach us how to love. And in case you missed it…..the very geography of his planet proves that this is what he is here to do.

Posted in Empowerment, Enneagram, Freedom

Living in Freedom Class

It has been a LONG time coming…..I am excited to announce that I will be offering my Living in Freedom class starting May 19th! (see flier attached.) This is your personal invitation!
Many of you have heard me rave about the Enneagram, and what a powerful tool it is for self-discovery, personal growth and transformation. It is through the Enneagram that I learned of my compulsion of perfectionism and its underlying passion of anger. It has been working with the Enneagram that I have learned to identify the triggers which feed this inner dissatisfaction and resentment so that I might calm these triggers while cultivating a greater sense of contentment within. Working with the Enneagram has helped me to feel more whole, more content, more at peace and to find productive ways to channel the inherent giftedness (and dissatisfaction) of being a Reformer (Type 1 on the Enneagram). I have used the Enneagram with clients and students for the past 12 years with terrific results.

In this course, Living in Freedom, I use ancient wisdom literature to unfold the nine temperament types of the Enneagram. I then present mindfulness and creativity exercises as tools through which we are able to fully integrate the lessons of the Enneagram, while providing effective practices that you can use beyond this course to deepen your own inner journey toward self-actualization…..the place we are compelled to go in our search for meaning, purpose, contentment and joy!

I am giving you first “dibs” at the course as I will be limiting registration to 12 participants. Also….please do not let the “ancient wisdom literature” (Judeo-Christian scripture) dissuade you. As many of you know, my approach with scripture has NOTHING to do with dogma…..and everything to do with finding your own truth beyond the words. 🙂



Posted in Authentic Freedom, Initiation, Spiritual Formation

Tested in Fire

Once we step onto the path of awakening, enlightenment, spiritual growth, consciousness, self-awareness (or whatever you want to call it), we are forever changed.  And, it is not a journey for the faint of heart!


Who will endure the day of his coming?

Who can stand when he appears?

For he is like the refiner’s fire,

or like the fuller’s lye.

He will sit refining and purifying silver,

And he will purify the sons of Levi,

Refining them like gold or like silver…

Malachi 3: 3-4a

Defining the “God Path”

Some people call it the path of enlightenment, others awakening, others being saved, others consciousness, others self-awareness.  I call it the God Path.  When we heed the restlessness and longing in our soul and begin the search for its remedy, we are on the God Path.  For most, the search for the remedy to this inner restlessness, longing and impatience begins outside … looking for the perfect job, partner, house, STUFF, that will quell this longing.  Eventually, we find that the external search produces NOTHING or worse, more longing and restlessness.  At some point, some give up and surrender to a life of quiet desperation.  The courageous, however, continue the search which eventually leads them WITHIN…to the only place where that longing might be satisfied.  I call this the God Path because it is God (consciousness, higher self, highest truth, Presence, Being) that we find within.  And it is God who is the source of our longing…..calling us HOME.

The God Path Requires ENDURANCE

As the prophet Malachi observed, the God Path is not for the faint of heart and requires a tremendous amount of endurance.   Endurance is required because on the God Path, every fear, ego-attachment, false perception reveals itself and asks for our attention so that it can be healed, transcended and released.  If money is one of our attachments, it will show up.  If we cling to power, status or fame, it will be IN OUR FACE.  If we do not believe we are worthy of love, our unworthiness will show up again and again and again until we remember that we are already LOVE, that love does not have to be earned, neither does it have to be taken away. If we have forgotten that we are uniquely gifted to reveal God in the world and if we have withheld these gifts from the world, we will be confronted by anxiety, depression, rage.  If we have harbored resentment toward another, forgiveness will elude us.  Again and again and again our fears and attachments will show themselves so that we can face them and do the work of moving through them so that we can be the WHOLE person God created us to be.

Help Along the Path

Authentic Freedom – Claiming a Life of Contentment and Joy provides tools to help you along the God Path.  It does so by illuminating the seven core fears that you will face along the path and presenting tools to help you heal and transcend these fears.  Through Authetic Freedom, we discover that forewarned is forearmed and we enter into the God Path armed with the resources we need to confront the fears, ego attachments and false perceptions as they present themselves to us.  Authentic Freedom presents the same tools used by our greatest spiritual teachers in their own journey along the God Path – Jesus, Moses, The Buddha, Krishna, Mohammed and others.

Personal Support

Because the God Path requires endurance and will test us like gold tested in fire, it is  helpful to have a personal guide along the path.  This personal guidance is the role of a Spiritual Director.  It is a Spiritual Director’s job to be a source of support for us along the path, to provide encouragement and also an objective presence to help us to see those things that may be lurking in the darkness – our unresolved ego attachments, the way we project our fears and attachments on to others, our resistance to the path that God may be laying out for us.  It is the responsibility of a Spiritual Director to help us hear the truth beyond our words and to see the light that is shining where we might see only darkness.  The role of a Spiritual Director is at once listener, coach and spiritual butt-kicker.

Rewarded for our Endurance

While the journey is not easy, the rewards are terrific.  For those who choose the God path and stick with it, there is fulfillment, contentment, love, joy and peace and the ability to endure the ups and downs of the human condition without being destroyed.  The God path provides for us the tools to transcend the fears, false perceptions and suffering of the human condition and to find the peace that resides in the midst of it all.  In choosing the God path, we find that heaven, nirvana, the kingdom of God is RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW and not on some planet light years away.

For support along the God Path, contact Lauri Lumby at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.  Or click on Services to learn more.

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Being Human, God, Healing, Mary Magdalene, shame, Surrender

Those Demons in My Head

Today’s blog explores those stubborn, deep, elusive, hard to heal wounds and where we can go for healing and comfort. 

No Doubt!

Yesterday while driving my daughter to volleyball practice, a song popped up on my CD player that spoke loudly and clearly about one of my own elusive, stubborn, hard to heal wounds  And….I’m pretty sure I’m not alone.  The song was In My Head by No Doubt.  Here the Youtube link:  and a portion of the lyrics:

I try to think about rainbows
When it gets bad
You got to think about something
To keep from going mad
I try to think about big fat roses
When the ship starts going down
But my head is wicked jealous
Don’t want to talk about it right now

Long distance
Don’t talk about ex-girlfriends
Don’t talk about you with out me
Don’t talk about your past

In my head
It’s only in my head
In my head
It’s only in my head

To learn more about the seven core fears (demons) and how to heal them, read Authentic Freedom.  Buy it HERE!

Demons in Our Heads

When scripture tells us that Jesus healed Mary Magdalene of seven demons, Luke wasn’t talking about the dudes in red morph suits donning horns and carrying pitchforks.  He was also not talking about the demons that make our heads spin around and vomit pea soup.  Luke was talking about the perceptions and voices of fear that plague our human existence and keep us from living in the peace, love and joy that make up our original nature in Oneness with God.  These demons, I have found, vary in their strength and stubbornness.  Some we can heal simply by naming them.  Others take years or maybe even a lifetime to transcend.  Some, it seems, stay with us until we die.

To learn more about the seven core fears (demons) and how to heal them, read Authentic Freedom.  Buy it HERE!

Stubborn, Willful Demons

There are two demons in particular who have plagued me for as long as I can remember.  These two demons say, It’s my fault and There’s something wrong with me. I have worked really hard to find healing and release from these demons, but I find the healing elusive.  The worst part is that these demons work together, rarely alone, at torturing me and keeping me imprisoned behind a wall of shame.  And, these demons are really tricky because they come disguised as the virtue of Integrity.  As a person of integrity, I strive to say what I mean and mean what I say.  I also want to own my part in a challenge or struggle before confronting another party.  I want to be clean within myself before taking a challenge out into the playing field.  I work really hard not to blame others before examining the mirror of my own guilt.  See how tricky these demons are?  It is truly a good and virtuous person who owns their own stuff, who does their own work, who can accept their own responsibility.  True……to a point.  It is the demons job to make sure that I never escape from the cycle of self-examination, culpability and blame.  It was ultimately the work of these demons that kept me stuck in my childhood wounds, seven years too long in an unhealthy marriage and hesitant to hold the other person accountable for their part in the hurtful end of a relationship.  It must have been my fault because there must be something wrong with me.  BLECH!

To learn more about the seven core fears (demons) and how to heal them, read Authentic Freedom.  Buy it HERE!

If at First You Don’t Succeed

Try Try again!   Or when all else has fails, turn it over to God.  This is the point I have reached with these two demons.  I have tried and tried and tried to find healing of these fears.  I have employed every tool at my disposal, every weapon in my arsenal.  I have employed the Authentic Freedom principles, the Aramaic Lord’s Prayer, mantra, Tonglen, the Enneagram.  And still, these demons sing their evil songs in my head and perform their wicked dance, surrounding me in darkness like Rothbart, the evil swan demon of Black Swan fame.  Damn them!  Literally!  So last night while wrestling these demons in my head,  after trying and failing with rainbows and big fat roses,  I screamed out in defeat, “GOD TAKE THESE AWAY FROM ME!”  I’m done with these demons and done fighting and struggling with them.  Your turn God!  Of course God answered.  This morning, I opened up the scripture for today and here were God’s words to me:

The Lord is my shepherd, there is nothing I shall want.

In verdant pastures he gives me repose;

Beside restful waters he leads me, he refreshed my soul.

Even though I walk in the valley of darkness

I fear no evil, for you are at my side.

Psalm 23

There you have it.  Today, God has the final word.

Who are the elusive demons that you struggle with?

How have you sought healing from these voices of fear?

How are you invited to give it over to God?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries

Posted in Gifts of Contemplation, Spiritual Formation, Spiritual Practices

Herein Lies the Rub – The Spiritual Journey requires WORK!

Today’s blog explores the WORK that is required if we want to have peace, contentment, joy, love and fulfillment in our lives. 

Coffee with a Friend

Yesterday, I had a long overdue coffee with my friend and spiritual brother, Steve.  Steve and I have been friends and fellow sojourners for nearly 20 years.  While our temperments differ greatly, especially in regards to spiritual practice (Steve is a Christian Zen practitioner, my practice tends to be more active.), we are 100% alike in our commitment to our respective spiritual practices and our passion about the value of contemplative living.  As we sipped our mutual beverages of choice, we shared the ways in which our lives have been dramatically altered because of the commitment we have made to our spiritual practice.  As we mused on about the fruits of diligent practice and the many ways our lives have been enriched through contemplative action, we couldn’t help but wonder, “Why don’t more people practice meditation, contemplation and mindfulness?”  We nodded our head in mutual agreement when the answer presented itself:  “Because it requires WORK!”

Herein Lies the Rub

As Steve and I arrived at this conclusion, it answered the question that I have been struggling to answer for at least 15 years.  Since first learning the rich traditions of Christian Contemplation and realizing the benefits of this practice, I have sought to share these practices with others.  Those who have said yes by attending the classes and meditation gatherings that I have offered have experienced enormous benefit.  Many have gone on to embrace a daily, if not at least a weekly practice and have experienced the fruits of their practice – greater peace, increased fulfillment, a deeper experience of compassion and love and the motivation to serve.  The struggle for me has been to get more than just a handful of people to say yes.  And I have never understood why this is such a struggle.  Doesn’t everyone want more peace, joy, fulfillment and love in their lives?  Of course!  But, in order to have these things, we have to work for them.  And it seems that the hard truth is that we want these things, but we don’t want to do the work that is required to obtain them.

Peace, love and joy require WORK!

The common search among human beings is for fulfillment.  We begin that search by looking outside of us to people, money, material possessions, fame, power, etc.  We soon learn that even in the aquisitions of these things, fulfillment is fleeting at best. As all spiritual teachers have come to know and eventually teach is that the only way to achieve fulfillment is through spiritual practice (defined by me as any activity that helps us to connect with peace, love, joy, leads us to the knowledge of our gifts and compels us to nurture, cultivate and share these gifts in service to the world for the good of humanity.).  And just like any other goal, inner fulfillment requires WORK!  If we want to lose weight, gain strength, learn a task, we have to work at it.  Spiritual Practice is the same…..which is why it is called PRACTICE.  If we really want peace, love, joy, fulfillment in our lives, we have to WORK FOR IT!  We have to make a commitment to our practice and we need to STICK WITH IT.  This, in and of itself is probably enough to keep most people from even trying meditation, let alone making a commitment to it.

Our Greatest Fear

If making a commitment to the work isn’t hard enough, an even bigger obstacle to beginning and maintaining a contemplative practice is that which strikes the greatest fear in human beings.  And this is not the fear of death, but something we fear even more.  And that fear is:  CHANGE.  More than death itself, (and maybe public speaking), human beings fear CHANGE.  Being creatures of habit and seekers of pleasure, we enjoy the perceived security in familiarity and predictability.  And if there is one thing for certain about embracing a spiritual practice, you and your life will CHANGE.  Ah yes, the changes that you experience will all be for your highest good and it will all be for the better…..but as we all know, CHANGE is NEVER easy!  It isn’t easy to give up our compulsive behaviors, our control dramas, our attachments, our entanglements, our habitual behaviors and thought patterns.  Let’s face it, our inner critic, martyr, dictator, perfectionist, glutton, sloth, slave, victim, miser, performer, worrier, control freak, etc. etc. etc. serve us in some way.  Giving up who we have thought ourselves to be and the life that we have known is not easy and as we move along the path of spiritual growth, change is 100% guaranteed.

The Few,  The Brave, The Contemplatives

The realization of humanities’ resistance to change and reluctance to work invites a different tool for measuring the work that I do.  Which brings me full circle in yesterday’s conversation with Steve as we pondered the question, “How do you measure success in spiritual endeavors?”  As I have sought to share the gift of contemplative practice, I have been tempted to measure success using the traditional, capitalistic, Western model.  Numbers and money = success.  The answer, it seems is not in the numbers or in the money.  Instead, it seems that the measurement of success (if we can even use the word “success” in regards to spiritual work) is in a single life.  If a single person has grown in peace, released compulsions and fears, found comfort, support, healing, etc. then I have done my job.  The invitation for me then is to remember that it is only the few and the brave that will say yes and that my job is to let go of my attachment to the outcome, numbers, money, etc. etc. etc.   SIGH….And here is where I am invited to do more WORK!  🙂

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries

Posted in Authentic Freedom

Do You Own Your Magnificence?

Today’s blog is inspired by the Authentic Freedom retreat I had the opportunity to share this weekend at St. Anthony Retreat Center in Marathon, Wisconsin.  In this weekend’s retreat, we explored through the Authentic Freedom protocol, the deep and profound magnificence of who God has made us to be.  Do you know how truly magnificent you are?

We Are…

For each child that’s born
a morning star rises
and sings to the universe
who we are.

We are our grandmothers’ prayers.
We are our grandfathers’ dreamings.
We are the breath of our ancestors.
We are the spirit of God.

We are
Mothers of courage
Fathers of time
Daughters of dust
Sons of great vision.
We are
Sisters of mercy
Brothers of love
Lovers of life and
the builders of nations.
We are
Seekers of truth
Keepers of faith
Makers of peace and
the wisdom of ages.

We are our grandmothers’ prayers.
We are our grandfathers’ dreamings.
We are the breath of our ancestors.
We are the spirit of God.

For each child that’s born
a morning star rises
and sings to the universe
who we are.


(from lessons by Y.M. Barnwell (c)1993)


We Are Magnificent

At this weekend’s Authentic Freedom retreat, we used the song, We Are from the Sweet Honey in the Rock CD, Sacred Ground. (here is a link to the song: as the anchor of the retreat.  In this song, we are reminded of our true magnificence, and all the dreams that brought us into being.  The problem, as we discovered and explored this weekend, is that many (if not most) of us have forgotten this truth.  Instead, we suffer with the fears and false perceptions that keep us from knowing and living out this inherent, God-given magnificence.

Authentic Freedom

The Authentic Freedom protocol, which is described in detail in my upcoming book, Authentic Freedom – Claiming a Life of Contentment and Joy gives us the tools to name, claim and offer up for healing and release, all those fears that keep us from living this magnificence. These fears include:

  • There is not enough
  • I am insignificant and have nothing to contribute to the world
  • I can’t (be and live as my most authentic self)
  • I am unloved or unworthy of love
  • I am not free to express my truth
  • I do not know (the truth, my path, etc.)
  • I am alone

As you read through the lyrics above, do you believe it to be true for yourself?

What is standing in the way of you owning your magnificence?

How do the above listed fears stand in the way of your own magnificence?

How are you being invited to more freely accept the magnificence that you are?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Spiritual Direction

Spiritual Direction and Fears

As we continue the exploration of the ministry of Spiritual Direction, we explore the role of a Spiritual Director in assisting their client in learning how to recognize the fears that are standing in the way of their ability to embrace their most authentic self and the role of the Spiritual Director in offering the client effective tools for finding healing of these fears.

The primary role of a Spiritual Director is to stand as objective witness to the spiritual journey of their clients.  The task of a trained, professional Spiritual Director is to hold space for their clients to move through the process of coming to embrace their truest and most authentic self.  Attentive presence is the greatest gift a Spiritual Director can offer as the hidden and vulnerable highest truths of their clients attempt to emerge.  A large part of this process of emergence is to confront and overcome the obstacles to freely living as our most authentic self.  These obstacles consist of the fears, wounds and false perceptions that imprison us within our false-self.  It is my job as a Spiritual Director to help you to recognize these obstacles and find effective ways to give them release so that your truest self may take flight.

One of the things that I am most grateful for as a Spiritual Director is my knowledge and experience in the field of energy medicine – specifically Reiki.  Through the integration of my knowledge and experience of Western Spiritual Practices and Reiki, I have found a short-cut to assisting clients in their journey of emergence.  Through the integration of these seemingly separate disciplines, I have come to the awareness of an intimate connection between our outward compulsions (addictive and unhealthy behaviors) and the spiritual fears that are at the root of these behaviors.  While changing our behaviors is an effective way to clear the path for our true self to emerge, what would happen if we could heal the behaviors at their source?  This is where healing our spiritual fears comes in handy.

In the work that I have done, I have uncovered seven core spiritual fears that seem to be at the root of all of our human compulsions, addictions and unhealthy behaviors.  These seven spiritual fears are the obstacles to our ability to stand fully in our truth and live as our most authentic selves.  The fears are as follows:

  • There is not enough (money, food, love, time, power, etc.)
  • I am insignificant and have nothing to contribute to the world
  • I cannot live as my most authentic self
  • I am not loved
  • I am not free to express my truth
  • I do not know my truth or my path
  • I am alone

Through the ministry of Spiritual Direction, I have been able to help many people learn how to recognize these fears as active within their lives and have offered effective tools through which they have been able to find healing and release from these fears.  Releasing these fears has the compound effect of releasing our compulsions, addictions and unhealthy behaviors and eases the release of these compulsions by healing them at their root.  Bringing healing to these fears allows us to live more and more fully as the women and men of compassion, contentment and joy that our Divine Source intended.

What is currently standing in the way of your ability to live more fully as your most authentic self?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries

Call Lauri today to schedule your own personal session for Spiritual Direction.  (920) 230-1313 or email

Posted in Authentic Freedom

Living Authentic Freedom – even in Divorce

I owe a debt of thanks to my blog readers for calling me out on my vagueness in Monday’s blog.  To set the record straight and eliminate any temptation to be vague – my husband and I are divorcing….hence the house search.  “Professional boundaries” tell me I should not share personal things on my blog…..but when I find myself confronted with the very fears that I have been called to help others heal, I sense that transparency, rather than “professional boundaries” may be what is called for.  I must also admit my own resistence to waving the flag of my own vulnerabilities for all the world to see.  So……here goes.

As we are moving through this process of redefining a nearly 20 year relationship, which in this case is calling for divorce, I find myself confronted daily with the very fears I am called to help others heal.  These are the spiritual fears that I outline in my Authentic Freedom classes, help clients name in private sessions and will be revealed in my book, Authentic Freedom – Claiming a life of contentment and joy.  So….here are the fears I’m being forced to face, confront and be open to having healed:

There is not enough – Ok, this is a biggie.  Is there enough money?  How will our needs for food, clothing, shelter, safety, healthcare, insurance, etc. etc. etc. be met on my current salary?  Will the resources be present to increase that income to meet the needs listed above?  Will we find and be able to afford the house that we need to meet our needs?  The list goes on and on and on…

I will not be able to bring forth life that will persist:  How will I be able to continue to use my gifts in a way that will not only support the life of others, but will also support the needs of my family?  Are my gifts of value?  Are they worthy of compensation?  Will the life I dream of actually come to fruition?  How will I maintain a healthy balance of work, play, creative endeavors, etc.

I can’t  Can I actually do this?  Will I have the courage to stay the course and continue on this path when I know it is the right thing?  Can I continue to share my ministry in the world? 

I am not loved or am unworthy of love – HHHMMMMM   I might save reflection on this one for later…..

I am not free to express my truth – Choosing to divorce has been very much a part of standing in truth…..and there is that lingering fear of the potential backlash of standing in our truth.  How will others receive this decision?  What “friendships” will decide to leave?  How do I respond to people’s reactions to the divorce?  How do I remain transparent without giving away those things I need to carry close to my heart (like the whys and reasons for the divorce).   What about the kids?

I do not know (my truth, my path) – I think I moved through this fear in FINALLY coming to the place of acknowledging that divorce was the right thing and would in the end be the most life-giving decision for all.  However, there is still that lingering doubt, “what if this is all one big mistake? What if I didn’t try hard enough?  What if I discerned incorrectly?”  I know this is simply temptation, but that lingering thoughts are there nonetheless.

I am alone.    Divorce has the potential for being a VERY lonely process.  It is easy to get sucked into victimhood and martyrdom.  It is also easy to slip into the place of helpless despair when looking at all the other fears above.  This is where I have to remember that there is a Divine Source (God) who is assisting me through this process and that I am in the company of all the other men and women who have blazed this trail before me.

So, there you have it!  These are my fears….and these are the universal spiritual fears that we all face at some time in our journey.  In the work that I do, I have been called to help others to name and acknowledge these fears as active in their lives and I offer the tools that help them to be healed of, or at least transcend these fears so that they can live a life of greater contentment and joy.  Now, here is the irony…..I am being forced, in a very real sense, to face these fears myself and put into practice the very tools I promise to be effective.  Ha….God is very funny and has a sick sense of humor.   The good news is that it is only because of the spiritual tools and practices I teach that I am able to move through this process at all and in doing so, realizing the fruits of this practice through all the miracles, gifts and blessings that have come by entering fully into this process and embracing the spiritual lessons that I now have the opportunity to learn.  So while I am forced to confront these fears, I am blessed by the healing and tranformation that are coming through this process.  It is for this that I am now grateful. 

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries