Posted in Inspiration, Lessons, Spiritual Development

Shhhhhh

Do you hear it? Me neither.  It is the deafening silence that occurs after the old has imploded upon itself, after that which is no longer life-giving has passed away in the fire of transformation, after all that remained of our old lives has turned to dust, and after we have been emptied of anything and everything that has been tested and shown to no longer support the life we were born to live.  This is the silence that happens after the old life has passed away and before the new is ready to be born.

Shhhhhhh. Remain still.  Refrain from trying to make things happen.  Cease from doing and tasking.  Resist the temptation to return to the old and familiar activities simply for the sake of creating movement.  The movement that once served is the movement now that will destroy.

Shhhhh. Be still.  Enter into the silence.  Be with the stillness.  Dive deeply into the discomfort of the unknown. Make friends with impatience, restlessness, longing, and boredom.  Surrender to the pain of death and the excruciating darkness of the unknown.

Shhhhh. Be still.  Be still.  Be still.  And listen.  It is in the silence you will hear the whispering of the new life as it is preparing to be born.

Shhhhhh.

 

Posted in Inspiration, Order of Melchizedek

The Promise of New Life in the Darkness

After death is the promise of new life. This is the Easter message and the law that nature teaches us over and over and over again.  A seed it planted.  It germinates and grows.  It matures and bears fruit.  It dies, returning to the earth where it plants the seeds for the next life to begin.

Original drawing by Lauri Ann Lumby

So is the true of our human experience. Even our cells are continually involved in this eternal journey of birthing, growing, maturing, dying, and then being born again.

But this dying and rising is not limited to the growth of our cells. This is the eternal dance of our human experience – if we have the courage to surrender to the journey – especially when it all looks like death.  Like it felt for me on Monday.  Facing the end of our dreams, is one of those moments that feels like death.  For me, this death was palpable.  I felt like death.  I felt the weight of death.  I felt as if my body had become my own tomb made out of lead.

Then yesterday I woke up to the dawn of a new day. Rather, I woke up to the void – the place within the tomb where the life that once was lay in repose.  It was an apt position for the final session of a 5 year journey (for some, longer for others) I had been facilitating – learning as I go.  This was the final session of the Order of Melchizedek training that I have been piloting locally before making it wholly available online.  In this portion of the training we had been studying the Aleph Beis and its connection to the major arcana in the Tarot. Yesterday’s lesson (the final lesson) was on the Hebrew letter “Tav” and The World card in the tarot. You will have to take the class to understand how these two seemingly opposing systems are connected, but as a way to bring the course to a close, I facilitated a shamanic journey for those in attendance, while joining them in my own journey.

In my journey, I was led to every journey I had done before. I was brought to every location, every person, every being, every animal, etc. and in each scene, that which appeared to be outside of me was absorbed into me. All perceived division was absorbed into and became part of me. This absorption continued and continued and continued, until I saw that I had become a black hole. I was the black hole and I was in the black hole, drawing in and absorbing every single aspect of the life I have lived so far. It was all drawn inward toward the center of the black hole – a center that doesn’t really exist. The energies of my whole life were being drawn in and compressed – compressed to the point of nothingness and everything. The depths of the void filled with unlimited potential. All that has been was being compressed, transformed and was becoming “fuel” for the life of the black hole. What I then came to understand is that everything was being compressed – the old life was coming to an end, and was being used as fuel/compost for the new life/new world/new universe that will burst forth out of the other side of the black hole once maximum compression was reached.

Today I sit in the black hole. Nothing more to do. Nothing more to be. This world I have known is done. Complete. I am whole. I sit in the void as the new life is being born in secret. I will know it when it arrives. Until that time. I simply am – Lauri.

 

Posted in shadow work

The Shadow Keepers

Shadow workers and Shadow keepers are those who have been given a deep and painful gift – the ability and calling to see, hear and FEEL the pain of the world. We are those who have no choice but to bear witness to the darkness, pain, hatred and fear in our world.  Not only are we called to be witness, however, we are also called to FEEEEEEEL it.  The purpose of this feeling (I continue to tell myself) is so that the darkness might be transformed and be brought into the light.  Sometimes we do this by pointing out the darkness so that others might see.  More often, however, it is accomplished through our being, so much so that often it brings us to our knees.  Yesterday was one of those days.

Teresa of Avila by Bernini

I did it to myself. I overworked myself for three straight days, culminating in an 18 hour day of frantic computer programming work that was largely out of my comfort zone, and as it turns out, not what I want for my business in the first place.  After 18 hours of work, I ended up taking it all down.  Then it hit me.  I woke up yesterday morning with the feeling of DEATH.  I felt chilled to the bone, nauseous, dizzy and my whole body hurt.  The sun hurt my eyes and any sound or movement made me feel like I might collapse.  I had no choice but to call in sick for the day and collapse on the couch where I intermittently slept and moaned, “I’m dying.”  Today I have the “hangover” from yesterday’s wrath.  UGH!

In the center of all of this I did the normal wondering, “What is wrong with me? Am I depressed?  How could I ever get a “real job” if I am struck down like this on a somewhat regular basis?”  Etc. etc.  Then I read these words of Ellias’ Lonsdale as they were quoted at www.thecosmicpath.com.:

The shadow vigil is not something we make up. It is not just our own gloominess and negativity. We are being shown the places others miss and we are being asked to stay tuned to these and to be aware, be alert, be in the spit for whatever might arise. And as we get into this stance, it may be too much to bear, but what we are being shown is vital to grasp, crucial to become a conduit for, even if we might become greatly darkened in the bargain.

So there it is. The calling of the shadow workers and the shadow keepers.  It is our task to BE IN the darkness.  To see it.  Hear it.  Feel it.  Often before it is even able to be seen.  (For example, I FELT the 800 troops and the “suspicious packages” even before they were announced).  We are called to be in it…..BUT……and here is the key for our own survival…….WE ARE NOT IT.  We are NOT the darkness.  We are not depressed.  There is nothing wrong with us.  What is wrong is the world when it strays from its original nature as love which we feel as “a disturbance in the force.”  Now….if there was only a way to get paid for the invaluable service we provide for the world in seeing, hearing, feeling and TRANSFORMING its darkness. 

Posted in Death, self-actualization, Spiritual Development, Spiritual Formation, spiritual healing, Spiritual Practices

Entering into the Darkness to Bring Forth the Light

Last Friday I hit the wall. I found myself overcome with the darkness of our world, despairing over that which causes me pain, confusion, frustration and deep sorrow.  As I shared my experience, I was surprised (not really) by the deafening silence when speaking of the darkness.  The only thing interrupting the silence was a post by one arguing for the light. “Keep your chin up……” they said.  At the time, I DID NOT want to keep my chin up, or look for the silver lining in the cloud.  I needed to wallow in the darkness – embracing the depth of sorrow, frustration and pain.  Not for the sake of self-flagellation, but for the purpose of transformation.

As a shadow worker, I have come to understand that the only way to transform the darkness, both within ourselves and in our world is to enter FULLY into the darkness.  It is only by entering into the darkness that we are able to bring forth the light.  While optimism has its place, there is a fine line between “the bright side of life” and repression.  As the Buddhists say, “what we resist will persist,” so why not embrace the darkness so we can hasten our journey toward the light?  Why wait around looking for the silver lining when the only way to the light is through the darkness?

darkness, dark into light, embracing the darkness, transformation, shadow worker, darkness and light are but one

Before I go on, I do want to thank one dear friend who shared her genuine concern that I had come to the edge of the cliff. For indeed I had…..just not the cliff she thought.  Instead, it was the cliff that my Soul Brother, Jared, invited me to jump off from, “Lauri, what would happen if you just allowed yourself to freefall?”  I thought I had been doing this, but apparently not enough.  So (after a two hour soul purging/transformation/healing chat with my Soul Brother) I let go AGAIN allowing myself to fall into the darkness and in falling into it, I fell through it.  I woke up this morning with a whole different attitude, and saw what had been in front of me the whole time.  Then while in yoga this morning, I was given the outline and kick in the pants I have needed for two years to finally get my Order of Melchizedek online training program off the ground.  (Official announcement coming soon!!!!)

The moral of the story is this: If you find yourself in the darkness, don’t run from it.  Embrace it.  As every shadow worker knows, on the other side of the dark (or within the darkness) is the light that has been there all along!

Or as the Psalmist said, “In you, darkness and light are but one.” (GO, there are so many ways to interpret that phrase!!!!)

PS Dear friends:  I promise if I have truly come to the end of my rope….I will definitely let you know!

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Being Human, church, God, Inspiration, Jesus, Lessons, Oneness with God, Raised Catholic

Claiming What is Truly Ours

“We are afraid of her. For centuries we have wanted nothing to do with her. Now she returns into our midst. She is substantively weighted down by a special knowledge. She is saturated with hidden forces. Her one key move is to claim what is truly hers without shame.” – Ellias Lonsdale from his book Star Speaks as quoted at www.thecosmicpath.com.

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 What is truly mine? What is truly mine?  What IS truly mine?

When I reflect on these questions, what comes to me is MAGIC. Magic has always been my inheritance.  The magic of my ancestors.  A dark, intuitive, mystical magic.  A magic that infuses one with the courage and endurance to stare down the darkness of the human condition.  To be present to pain, struggle, fear, failure, challenge, heartache, heartbreak, betrayal and abuse and live to tell about it.  The magic to not be destroyed by the darkness, but to find my way through it.  This is the victory – to not get swallowed up or destroyed by the darkness, but in the darkness to find myself.  And in finding myself, discovering the tools to help others find themselves. 

Life is death and life is pain, this I know all too well. But lying within the darkness is also the light, if we have the eyes to see.  As a germinating seed has to break through its shell and then push its way through the darkness of the earth to find the light.  So too is this our truth – OUR truth.  In order to become the fullness of our potential, we must find our way through the darkness. 

What led me into and through the darkness, ironically, are the same. What led me into and then led me through the darkness is my faith – specifically, the Catholic faith in which I was raised.  Here I met my “God.” Here I was courted by my “God.”  Here I fell in love with my “God.”  Here my “God” betrayed me.  In this I came to know what Jesus knew  – that I too am a uniquely gifted Daughter of “God,” called to be God’s love in the world.  But even more than this, I came to know what Jesus REALLY knew – in order to truly be the “Son of God,” he had to find a new god.  As he was hanging there, dying on the cross, Jesus found a new God and this God was not the God “out there” who had forsaken him, instead, it was the Divine Self within to whom Jesus surrendered his spirit.  The God he “knew” now became truly known.  At the end of our life, there is truly no one there, for all dwells within ourselves and here we have found our way home.

This is not nihilism, this is truth. And yet, we are also never alone.  For within and among us are all the Souls who have gone this way before us.  And with these Souls, and all the Souls yet to express themselves, we are one.  We are together and we are One.  And in our Wholeness, there is God.  The wholeness of who we all have been and all the potentials of who we are yet to become.  The Creative vision of the universe forever and always discovering, creating and recreating itself.  The seed becomes the sprout, becomes the plant, becomes the blossom, becomes the fruit, becomes the seed – the never ending cycle of creation – birth, life, death, the time in between and the cycle starts all over again.

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All of this I discovered through my Catholic faith, or rather, I discovered this in the Jesus that was hidden within my Catholic faith, hiding behind centuries of dogma, doctrine and man’s need to have power and control. This was a Jesus that LIVED – no longer worshipped as he hung broken and bleeding on the cross, thereby making suffering our “God.”  Instead, this was the Jesus who was fully human.  This was the Jesus who loved, who laughed, who knew desire, who sometimes became angry, afraid and despairing and who in this, tasted the fullness of the human experience.  This was the Jesus who was killed by selfish and greedy men who felt threatened by the truth he came to reveal – the truth of a Divine within where true authority dwells.  This was a Jesus who listened to his heart, who came to show people love and who experienced love himself.  And in this love, he also experienced heartbreak – the betrayal of friends, the loss of family and the ultimate heartbreak of all – having to be beaten, tortured and killed while the woman he loved stood watching.  This was the Jesus I came to know when “God” came calling.

This is the Jesus who shows us the way – if we have the eyes to see and the ears to hear – to see and hear beyond man’s need to twist Jesus’ message for their own political agenda, who turned Jesus’ message of love to one of divisiveness and fear. “We are the One true faith and all others are going to hell.”  This is not what Jesus came to teach.  Instead, Jesus only taught love and the consequences of choosing something other than love.  If he learned nothing else by his human experience, it was that we all have a choice.  Choose fear or choose love.  The way we feel within ourselves is then determined by this choice.  Do we allow the inherent suffering of the human condition to destroy us or do we seek out the love hiding in the midst of the darkness?  THIS was Jesus’ magic – the ability to see the love no matter where or how deeply it was hiding.  This, I must admit, is my magic too….even in the days when I am sure the darkness will destroy me, I somehow always find my way through.  This is what I came to learn.  This is what I come to teach.

This is what is truly mine, along with everything that helped me find my way here –

What is truly yours?

 

 

Posted in Being Human, Death, End of the World Prophecies, Freedom, Inspiration, New World, world changes

Welcoming the Darkness

For many I know, including myself, this has been a very trying time. It has been a time of uncertainty, anxiety and fear.  The world “out there” is a disaster.  Natural disasters, pipeline explosions, terrorist bombings, the clown show we used to call our presidential elections, the stock(stark) market is just that….stark, and horror of all horrors, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are getting divorced.

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While the world “out there” grapples with its death, we are wrestling with our own. The death we are facing is not our literal physical death (though that is the struggle for many), it is the death of all that we have known and all that we thought we knew about ourselves.  The old world is dying and the way in which we have functioned in that old world is no longer useful.  More importantly, we cannot be who we were for a world that is no longer because we need to become who we ARE for the new world that is about to arise out of the rubble.

As we are facing the death of self, all our old fears, insecurities, wounds, past hurts, betrayals, etc. are showing themselves. They are showing themselves so as to be witnessed, felt, acknowledged and thanked (yes, I said “thanked”) so that they can MOVE ON.  In order to allow this transition, this “moving on,” we have to BE WITH our darkness.  We need to wallow in it.  We need to bathe in it.  We need to feel the excruciating pain of LACK so that we can finally LET IT GO.  This is not the time for “thinking different thoughts” so that we can rise beyond the SH.T and see it only as light.  This is a time to ACKNOWLEDGE the darkness and BE WITH IT.  Remember, “that which we resist will persist.”  It is the same with our darkness.  If we pretend it’s not there, deny it, ignore it, chant words of affirmation and goodness trying to make it light instead of the dark, dank, moldering, smoldering pile of crap it is, that pile of crap will simply get bigger.

Be with the darkness. Get really pissed off.  Rant, rave, vent, tear your hair out, rip your clothing, break some dishes, be angry.  You earned it!  You have paid long and hard for the work you came here to do.  You’ve suffered.  You’ve been poor.  You’ve been made an outcast, condemned as a witch, ridiculed for the love you came to be in the world.  Welcome the darkness you are feeling now.  Thank it for all it has taught you (compassion, understanding, the desire to help another, humility, mercy, tenderness, love).  And then, let it thank you in return as it departs, itself dying with the “out there” world, along with the role you have played for that dying world.

Then wait. Your new Self is waiting to be born, the Self that will usher you into the new world in which you will be living and your Divine purpose in that new world.

For further support in dark times, read my blog Light Workers, Shadow Workers and Middle-World Workers, and check out my new online course The Dark Goddess in the Bible (click on image below to learn more).

Click on image above to learn more and register
Click on image above to learn more and register

 

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Being Human, Lessons, Magic, Mystics, self-actualization

Reflections on Being a Shadow Worker

The journey toward self-actualization is about coming to know ourselves….all of ourselves, and learning to love it all…especially the things that sometimes cause us pain. One of the things I have come to know about myself is that I am a Shadow Worker.  This gift has often caused me pain, especially when the reaction to my gift is often (perceived) rejection. Last night, while in meditation with the students in my “What is Your Magic” class, I received some further insights about the gift of being a Shadow Worker:

shadowworker.pixabay

A true Shadow Worker embodies love – a love that does not cringe in the face of darkness, but instead stands confidently in the presence of darkness, knowing that darkness and light are but one. The love that IS the Shadow Worker shines a light on all that has forgotten its true nature as love so that which covers the love can rise to the surface to be seen – so that it may then be healed and released.  The Shadow Worker can’t help this…it is its very nature and simply what happens in their presence. Some receive this love as the gift that it is and are healed and transformed.  Others reject this gift as they have rejected themselves.  Unwilling to see their own self-rejection, they project this rejection on the Shadow Worker, making them the enemy.  The Shadow Worker (once they know and understand their gift) receives this rejection and sends it back as love.

What sets the Shadow Worker apart is that they can stand in the darkness, withstand the darkness, endure the darkness. They do not run and hide, instead, the stand in the darkness, holding it, loving it, allowing it to be dark until it chooses otherwise.

The Shadow Worker comes in all shapes and sizes, and are endowed with a variety of gifts – some are healers, teachers, counselors, artisans, writers, leaders, prophets, etc. All are known by their love and the edge of darkness that upholds them.

Some famous Shadow Workers throughout history: Joan of Arc, Barack and Michelle Obama, Martin Luther King, Jr. Gandhi, Jesus, Mary Magdalene, Anne Boleyn, Catherine of Siena.

To identify your own unique giftedness, check out my online course What’s Your Magic?  Learn more HERE. 

 

Posted in Being Human, Divine Revelation, Empowerment, Inspiration

Poem of the Awakened (aka the Prophet’s Lament)

From today’s scripture readings:

The Lord GOD has given me
a well-trained tongue,
that I might know how to speak to the weary
a word that will rouse them.
Morning after morning
he opens my ear that I may hear;
and I have not rebelled,
have not turned back.
I gave my back to those who beat me,
my cheeks to those who plucked my beard;
my face I did not shield
from buffets and spitting.

The Lord GOD is my help,
therefore I am not disgraced;
I have set my face like flint,
knowing that I shall not be put to shame.

Isaiah 50: 4-7

It seems Isaiah and I would have a lot to say to each other.  Here, is my

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Poem of the Awakened (aka The Prophet’s Lament)

Standing on the edge of fear,

Having chosen the path of my truth.

In service to love.

For my own sake

and for the betterment of the world.

Obstacles at every turn.

Adversaries whispering doubt in my ear.

Tempting me to turn away from

what only my heart can know.

A voice crying out in the wilderness

speaking only to sand?

Yet with each step forward…

every movement toward love…

every step in the direction of truth…

A sonic boom reverberates through the universe –

A tidal wave

transforming the darkness

to love instead of fear.

While few, in fact, have ears to hear,

The power of love is greater than the power of fear.

And truth wins out in the end.

 

Posted in Discernment, Empowerment, Inspiration, Lessons, Mystics, Superheroes

Light Workers, Shadow Workers and Middle World Workers

Today’s blog – as an offering of the Superhero Academy – explores the difference between light workers, shadow workers and middle-world workers.  Healers of every sort populate our world and deserve to be honored for their uniquely special gifts.

Please note, after January 1, 2015, the Superhero Report, Authentic Freedom Virtual Church Service and Agape Meditation Newsletter will be available by subscription only.  For a very reasonable monthly fee, (about the price of your weekly cappuccino) you can receive all three.  Subscribe HERE or use the Paypal link below:

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It takes all kinds of Superheroes to heal and change the world.

In the twenty plus years that I have been involved with the world of complementary and ancient healing practices, I have learned that there are all kinds of Superheroes – men and women who are here to heal and change the world.  When it comes specifically to the people I know who are healers, they seem be of one of three varieties – lightworkers, shadow workers and middle-world workers.  Each of these varieties of healers bring their own unique gifts and talents to the fore and have their own audience to which they have been sent to minister.

Lightworkers

Galadriel-oLightworkers are easy to identify and are those who have been given the most attention as we have moved into the new age and ascension movements.  Lightworkers are just that – light.  They tend to speak the language of angels and fairies and draw our attention to things of sacred geometry, cellular healing, quantum layers, and mystical realms.  Not seeming to be “from here,” Lightworkers dress in ethereal almost mystical attire – a reflection of the light and love filled realms from whence they came.  Lightworkers are highly attuned to “the heavens” and are here to remind us of and re-attune us to our Divine, angelic and otherworldly nature.   You know when you are in the presence of a Lightworker because they are really nice and give you the impression they would not hurt a fly. The challenge for Lightworkers is just this – that they are sometimes too nice – not trusting their intuition about another’s deceit or lack of integrity.  Lightworkers can also be challenged when their quest for the light is at the expense of or privileged over the human experience – the reason all of us are ultimately here.

Shadow workers

gollum_fin2If we can think of healers existing along a continuum, Shadow workers exist on the opposite end of the spectrum from Lightworkers and as such, possess polar opposite gifts.  Shadow workers are fiery-warrior types and possess a darkness about them.  They live in the shadows and are comfortable in the darkness.  As such, they are extremely gifted in helping us to identify our shadows and bring them to the light.  Shadow workers help us dive deep into our fears, our past woundedness and traumas, our compulsions and all the parts of ourselves we have hidden from the world – and often from ourselves.  Shadow workers are relentless in their pursuit of darkness so that it can be integrated within us.  Shadow workers are masters as Recapitulation and Soul Retrieval and help people reassemble the lost parts of themselves into a harmonious, cohesive whole.  Since most people resist their shadows, Shadow workers often feel dangerous – at least at first glance.  Again, they have a darkness about them.  While this darkness can be a gift, it can also be the bane of the Shadow worker’s existence if not treated with respect.  Many shadow workers I know have struggled with addictions.  These addictions, I believe, arose because of the shadow worker’s fear of their own power – and perhaps for some – because in the past they have used their powers for their own benefit (and even to cause harm) and not for the common good.  Healing the past frees shadow workers to do what they came here to do – help people fully embrace the HUMAN that they came here to be.

Middle World Workers

Middle World Workers are those who exist somewhere between Lightworkers and Shadow Workers.  In other words, they are a little bit of both.  Middle Workers are drawn to the heavens, but are also comfortable in the shadows.  Middle Workers seek to bring light and love into the world, but also invite us to embrace and integrate the shadow.  Middle Workers understand that we are not here to avoid or transcend the human experience – instead, we are here to live it fully, while also remembering the fullness of our Divine nature.  Middle Workers invite us to remember the fullness of our Divinity while living the fullness of the human condition.  Middle Workers seek to assist people in bringing their Divine nature fully into the human experience while inviting the human experience to become Divine.  “As above, so below,” might be considered the mantra or mission statement of Middle World Workers.  You can recognize Middle World Workers in their approachability and in the way they are authentically real and how they seem to be of light and love while living the human experience.

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One ring to rule them all…

In this human experience – we need them all – Lightworkers, Shadow workers and Middle World workers.  We need those who remind us of our light, along with those who invite us to confront and integrate our shadow.  And, we need those who help us to find the glue that holds it all together.

What kind of worker are you?

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Posted in End of the World Prophecies, Inspiration, Lessons, Mystics, world changes

The Time of Reckoning is at Hand

The Time of Reckoning is at Hand

 A profound thank you to Jared Dubin for sharing his poetry, his wisdom, his vision, and his art in today’s blog. Jared and I met at the Presentation Center in Los Gatos, California, during the first day of our graduate school journey.   It was recognition and love at first sight. We knew the moment we looked into each other’s eyes that we had known each other for an eternity and had spent significant lifetimes together with a shared mission and purpose. Since that moment, Jared has been a source of love and support for me and I can only hope I have done the same for him. Jared, is wise beyond his years and like me, is a lover, a peacemaker and a shit-disturber. Jared is my soul brother and we share a special kind of love, a love greater than romance – what the Greeks would refer to as agape’.  Jared, I love you brother….and thank you for sharing your soul with those who might find this blog!  XXOOXXOOXXOOXXOO

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Light so bright it forgot itself

Lost track of the darkness within

+ started chasing it without
a thought to the destruction it would spread

by the time it burn itself out
half the planet would be

Dead.

We live in highly peculiar times. Something miraculous is happening, the world is going through changes on all levels. Evolution is happening, in ways not yet understood within the confines of our labs or textbooks. Humankind, and the face of the very planet, is transforming into something new.

So what the hell does that mean for all of us? Well, for starters, we ought to let go of the notion that we know much of anything at all. Once I believed the only thing anyone could truly know was their own intentions. To this day I think there is more truth in that idea than I presently understand.

There is magic in our intentions, and magic in our words. With every utterance we reinforce a reality, and this is a sword that cuts both ways.

The world is going through changes, and the longer we are in this period of change, the more unfamiliar things may become. It will be all too easy to see demons in the darkness before our eyes have time to adjust, and thus either run away or attack out of fear. The time for running and the time for violence has passed, and if we continue now to act out of fear, we do so at our own peril.

There is more going on here than we may presently understand. Though I believe we head now, for the first time in centuries (or perhaps millennia), towards a more harmonious relationship with ourselves and our world, I do not believe that this will look like an endless rainbow-sunshine festival all angels and smiles and love-beams filling the Earth to the brim with golden blinding light.

No, part of the reason we got to this point is because we drew a contrast, a line in the sand. On our side of the line we put love and truth and beauty and everything we perceived as good, and we said, “This is ours.” And on the other side of that line we threw destruction and falsehood and all of the ugly human emotions, and we said “That is the darkness, it is not us.”

Thus we lost sight of our own darkness, and it began to work outside of our awareness. We went around hunting for “demons” and did not notice the swath of destruction our own shadows left in our wake.

Consider at the macro level, a country claiming the right to police the world, occupying and destroying foreign lands in the name of peace and democracy, while its own interior, its people and infrastructure, slip increasingly into poverty and depression.

Or consider what goes on inside your own being, as you exult in your joy but disparage your own darkness, creating shadows out of those emotions and thoughts you deem undesirable, failing to own them because they do not fit your vision of an ideal world.

We have flown too close to the sun, and we were blinded by it, and did not even see as our wings melted right off our backs and we began to plummet inexorably into an underworld of our own creation. And all the way down, we pointed fingers at each other and the world, failing to take responsibility for all that we saw.

Because if we’re talking about God, or the Universe, or the Great Spirit, what have you, we are talking about something that transcends our cognitive understanding. And if we are talking about a Divine totality, then we are talking about something that contains all within. That means the shit comes along with the crystals. It’s all divine, it’s all life.

And if we are calling ourselves divine and magical beings, how could the darkness not also be our birthright? Inside of me is a tyrant, a looter, a rapist, a racist. There is a huge homophobe who in particular has been giving me trouble. As Walt Whitman wrote, I am large, I contain multitudes. It does no good to demonize those humans who have fallen prey to their own demons. We must now redeem, not destroy.

As we realize the reality of our being –that we are more than mere flesh and infinite in spirit, we must remember that all things falling within the confines of infinity are ours. In the creation of what is to come, we will do well to include our darkness in our reckoning, lest we once again lose sight of it, allowing it to run amuck under our negligence.

Both light and darkness are here to stay. And as we create a world that sustains every part of us, body, mind, and soul, we must understand and make room for the light and the dark. After all, are the two not simply relative points along an infinite spectrum? In every apparent light and shadow, there are infinite shades of each. We are no different.

jaredJared Dubin was raised in the suburbs of New York City, the capital of the world. As a child he spent many an hour whirling and flying about his backyard and beyond, fighting off monsters and dragons and other various foes. As he got older he had high hopes of helping the world -he would dream of becoming president, believing that the most help could be offered by the one with the most power. Older still, he became more and more keenly aware of the places where his true being was at odds with the world he wished to save. Eventually he had to let go of everything to become what he is now -he forsook the world, and his future in it, and instead clung to love, most of all for himself, with ever last breath of his being. Recently he has reemerged, centered in himself and once again foolish enough to try his hand at saving the world. Asker of many questions, taker of many adventures, and jester of many courts, he will do whatever it takes to fight in the name of freedom, beauty, truth, and of course, love