Posted in divine mother, women

All About Eve: Awakening to Our True Nature

As I was awakening this morning, Eve came to me. She revealed herself to me as a black woman with a magnificent afro and with eyes which gleamed with a brilliant blue light.  She was accompanied by the tools of her trade – specifically the light of the Soul which awakens each of us to our true nature and which compels us on the search and fulfillment of our life mission and purpose.  This light of the Soul has been depicted by the ancients in the form of a serpent of fire (more on that later).  Eve came to remind me of her purpose so that I could remind humanity.  Eve was not the temptress; neither was she the source of original sin!  Eve was the awakener – awakening humanity out of its fearful nature into the truth of love.  But don’t take my word for it.  Below are Eve’s words meant to speak directly to your Soul:


Eve Speaks Part 1

First of all….you know I’m a myth, right!? I am a myth. There was no literal Adam and Eve.  And….we are all Adam and Eve.  This is the mystery of myth.  My story…our story…is the human story and it might interest some of you to know that the version of our story that you find in the book of Genesis isn’t even original.  Instead, your Jewish ancestors borrowed this story from their captors in Babylon because it helped them make sense of their own situation – plucked out of the home they had come to love and away from the god they had come to know in the temple into virtual slavery and having to find a new god and a new way of relating to their god while exiled in the land of Persia under the rule of the Chaldean king, Nebuchadnezzar II. (Google it if you don’t believe me!)

But just because my story didn’t actually happen, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. In fact, as is the case of all myth, my story communicates deep and profound truths – truths that are found in layers depending on the reader’s current state in life and their own unique perspective on life, love and God. To some, my story represents disobedience and punishment. To others, the subjugation of the Divine Feminine by warring hoards of patriarchal men. To others I represent the dawn of creation. And to others I represent the source of original sin and the danger of feminine wiles. None of these interpretations are wrong, but none are complete or absolute truth either.

All that being said, today I want to share with you my favorite version of my (our) story. It goes like this…..

Once upon a time, we knew nothing but God. We knew nothing but the infinite, all-encompassing, overwhelming, unconditional love of God. In this state of knowing, we also knew ourselves to be this love for in this knowing we were one with God and knew nothing other than this oneness. Then one day, God wanted us to understand ourselves as seemingly separate from God – still overwhelmingly encompassed in God’s love, but separate. In this separateness, God created infinite expressions of God’s self. Together, we represented the prototypes of what human beings would one day become. In this state, we lived in complete harmony and peace – knowing ourselves as nothing but love and in this love, still intimately connected with God. This was paradise – what the scripture writers have called “Eden.” For an eternity we basked in this state of Divine Love – seemingly separate in this love but intimately connected with the fullest expression of this Love which is God.

Then one day, God, (who is really just a child at play), decided to try something new. God said, “I have this idea of a human being – a creature that would be made in our image, but will be in physical form.” As expressions of the Divine, we jumped at the chance to participate in God’s creation, so we volunteered, “Let us be this new creation – let us become human beings.” But then God dropped the bomb – “Thank you for wanting to participate in my play. But I must warn you, if you should accept this task, if you should become human, you will forget. You will forget the love that you now know yourselves to be. More importantly, you will forget me. You will forget your origin as One with me and the peace and harmony that comes with that knowing.” We had to think about this for awhile. What would it be like to forget love? What would it be like to forget God? What would it be like to forget who we really are? As we pondered this opportunity, God remembered, “You know, you won’t really forget all of it. In fact, we can never truly forget our original nature. We can never truly forget love. Because as part of me, we are never really separate, it will just seem that way. And what if I help you out a bit by planting a seed within your human heart of remembrance – something that will help you to remember and guide your way back to me? Would that help?” We thought about it some more and then we agreed, “Yes, we would participate in God’s play and try out this thing of being human.” And so we did. We agreed to become human and came down into the world as human beings – seemingly separate from God, but always one just the same. This is how it began.

Check out our Divine Feminine course bundle HERE.   

Eve Speaks Part 2

Hello my dear children, I have spoken to you once before about my (our) Divine origins and how I (we) were created in the image and likeness of Divine Love and freely chose to engage in God’s play at being human, how we chose the perceived separation from our Divine Source in Love and Oneness so that we could experience ourselves as individual and unique so that God could experience Godself in all if Her infinite number of expressions. Now you all know the story that has been told of this separation, how the human experience in all its pain and suffering is actually punishment for disobeying God by eating the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  While some may find comfort in this interpretation of the ancient tale, there is another perspective and an even deeper truth that lies hidden within this story for those who have eyes to see.

As I mentioned in the first telling, the story of “the fall of man” is not even original to the Hebrew people who in the latter days approaching the Common Era, placed this story in their scriptures. Instead, this is a Babylonian story borrowed by the Hebrews from the popular Gilgamesh Epic as it helped to explain their plight as conquered and indentured slaves of the Babylonians. Once a thriving and powerful nation, Israel had been conquered, their temple destroyed, and all people of value deported to Babylon to live as slaves to their conquerors.  They had lost their home.  They had lost their God.  Believing in a punitive and jealous god, it made sense to them that they were being punished for something terrible they had done.  They then chose women, and all that had been associated with feminine power – the serpent, the fruit, knowledge and wisdom – as scapegoats for their suffering and pain. This battle between the warring patriarchal god and the peace of the divine feminine had been going on for ages, but the Babylonian captivity cemented this divide.

This is the historical perspective on my tale. But, for those who have eyes to see, there is an even deeper truth – one that resonates beyond history and speaks to the Soul of the human race – a people that long to be freed from the pain and suffering of the human condition and returned to their original state in Oneness with LOVE in God.  This is the story of EVE as awakener.  But even more than this, this is the story of WOMEN (or the Divine Feminine within us) as the Awakeners – those sent to become awakened themselves and then through their own awakening, to become awakeners for others – most especially the men (the Divine Masculine within each of us).  Here is how it goes in the book of Genesis:

Now the snake was the most wise (usually translated “cunning”) of all the wild animals that the Lord God had made. He asked the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You shall not eat from any of the trees in the garden’?” The woman answered the snake: “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden; it is only about the fruit of the tree in the middle of the garden that God said, ‘You shall not eat it or even touch it, or else you will die.’” But the snake said to the woman: “You certainly will not die! God knows well that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like gods, who know good and evil.” The woman saw that the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eyes, and the tree was desirable for gaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it; and she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened…  The man gave his wife the name “Eve,” because she was the mother of all the living.

Genesis 3: 1-7, 20

This is the largest, widest, deepest truth of the Genesis tale – WOMEN are the AWAKENERS of the human experience.  To state this in more universal terms, apart from the human temptation to divide by gender, the DIVINE FEMININE is the awakener of the human condition as it is embodied in people of all genders.  THIS is the task of the Divine Feminine as it is embodied in human form – to WAKE US UP.  Specifically, to wake us up out of the illusion of separation – the illusion that is the cause of our fear, the cause of our “sin” and the cause of the suffering and pain in the human experience.  The Divine Feminine within us is that which REMEMBERS our ONENESS with Love, with God and with all of Creation.  The Divine Feminine within us is that which awakens us to this remembrance and then calls us to return to our origin in Unity and Wholeness.  As it plays out in our masculine/feminine roles, (I use these terms as they relate to energy, not gender.  Masculine being the active, protective, provider energy and Feminine being the energy of receptivity, allowing, and receiving) it is the feminine which is called to awaken and in its awakening, to guide and support the awakening of the masculine.

For full feminine empowerment, check out the Magdalene Priestess Training.

EVE was not a disobedient sinner who through her “sin” brought punishment to the whole human race. EVE is the AWAKENER who calls us all to awaken out of the sleep of ignorance into the knowledge of THE TRUTH – that LOVE is our original nature.  She then shows us how to return to that LOVE – right here in the human experience, thus returning us all to the Garden where we will experience heaven on earth.

How have you experienced the presence and energy of the awakener within you? How has she led your to the truth of your Soul?

Image Source: Pixabay

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Posted in Authentic Freedom, Being Human, Lessons, self-actualization, Spiritual Formation

You Can Run but You Can’t Hide!

The gift and curse of being a catalyst

How many times have you heard the light of a candle used as an example of the function of the light “filling a previously darkened room with light?” The problem with this metaphor is that it neglects a critically important aspect of light – the casting of shadows.  Anything that stands in the direct line of the light that is seeking to find its way into a room casts a shadow and within this shadow is the darkness that the light is trying to dispel.

This is how it is with those of us who have been given the gift/curse of being a catalyst. We come into a space bringing our light, and while our intention is always and only love, that which stands in the way of our light casts shadows and reveals the places where darkness remains.

The work of the catalyst begins first with ourselves. Over and over and over again opportunities show up in our lives to witness and then decide what to do with (ie: heal) our own shadows.  This is the warrior/mastery work that we have all been called to.  In the catalyst, however, it is the work from which we cannot run, neither can we hide.  The work of confronting our unhealed wounds and unacknowledged fears will not be ignored.  As one colleague once observed, “God is a nag,” and this has never been more true than in our own journeys of self-actualization….especially in those who are called to support others in that same journey.

The work of the catalyst does not end there. If we are a catalyst, not only are we waking up to ourselves, we are serving as vessels through which others have an opportunity to become awakened – or to awaken even more deeply to their true nature. The problem is that not everyone wants to wake up and not everyone is willing or able (in possession of the tools) to do the necessary work of healing the darkness (unhealed wounds and unacknowledged fears) within so that their magnificent light might emerge.  The reality of this makes the catalyst sad…..especially when the reaction to the catalyst’s light is rejection or worse retaliation.  In the latter, we suddenly become the enemy – by no fault of our own – but simply out of the receiving party’s resistance to their own light.   (sad face emoji).

While the initial response of the catalyst to this refusal of the light might be felt as rejection or retaliation, the deeper sadness is over the refusal of the receiving party to accept their light. For this is the hope and dream of the catalyst – that all sentient beings come to know the Divine magnificence (LOVE) that dwells within them and become empowered to live that love in the world.  To a catalyst, there is no other life worth living except the one in which we have an opportunity to be love in the world and when we witness another refusing this love, we have no choice but to grieve.  The good news is that whether it is through ourselves or another, no matter how hard one tries to run from their light, they cannot hide.  Love will hound them and in the end (even if that end be death), love always wins.



Posted in About Lauri, Divine Revelation, Mary Magdalene, Mystics, teachers

Magdalene at the Front Door – The Dream that Started it All

Today’s blog continues my experiment with Hildegard of Bingen medicine – sharing my visions in the hopes of supporting the healing and release of 9 months of migraines, panic attacks, vertigo and other things! In today’s blog, I share the dream that started it all….the dream in which Mary Magdalene came knocking at my front door.

Mary Magdalene by Dana Lumby
Mary Magdalene by Dana Lumby

It’s been so many years since I was visited upon by “the dream that started it all”… that I can’t even be sure of the exact date, or even the year, but I know that it was when my children were quite young – 2 and 4 years old respectively, I think, and it was when their father and I were still together. The dream took place in the home in which we were living – a lavender, story-and-a-half  Victorian cottage with a wrap-around front porch and two “front” doors – one on the front of the house that entered directly into the formal living room and the other on the side of the house which entered into the sitting room.  The latter was the door we used to enter and exit the home and the door we thought of as “the front door.”

In the dream, I dreamed that I was sleeping beside my husband in our second floor bedroom and our children were fast asleep in their respective rooms, only feet away from our own. I was “awakened” from my sleep (in the dream) by a knocking at the front door of the house.  I “woke up” (while still in the dream) and got out of bed.  I walked out of our bedroom and down the hall to the stairs.  I descended the stairs which emptied into the sitting room.  The room was dimly lit and as I gazed across the room at the front door, I could see a hooded figure standing on the other side of the curtained window of the front door, standing just beneath the brightly lit porch light.  I “heard” a voice say, “Open the door.” Strangely unafraid, I went to the door and opened it as I had been asked.  Standing on the other side was a woman about my height – or maybe a little taller – with long, dark, curling hair, wearing a dark red hooded cloak.  The hood of the cloak was pulled up over the crown of her head casting a shadow over her face so I couldn’t quite make out her features. Her face was gazing down toward something she held in her hands.  I followed her gaze and saw that in her hands she held a smallish wooden chest crafted in dark, weathered wood.  The wooden chest looked ancient, but well cared-for.  She held the wooden chest out toward me and as my hands reached out to receive it, the curved lid of the box opened.

Inside the box, lying on a bed of purple velvet, was my own heart. As I took the box with my heart in it from her hands, a rush of images filled my mind – images of Snow White, the evil queen, the box that was to contain Snow White’s heart, a half-bitten apple, the Son of a King, and the kiss that awakened the sleeping princess.

Then I looked into the eyes of the woman in the red cloak and saw that the woman looking back at me was me. In silent words I heard her say, “I Am the Magdalene,” strangely something I had known all along.



Posted in Empowerment, Superheroes, world changes

Superheroes Report – July 8, 2014

As I promised many of my readers, I will provide a reporting on what transpires at the Superhero’s gatherings.  I will not be sharing anything that was shared in confidence, only general information that may be helpful and supportive to the Superheroes out there who do not live in Oshkosh and therefore are not able to attend our gatherings.  We know you are here in spirit and benefitting from the work being done here! 


The First Gathering

We had the initial gathering of the New Superheroes last night with great energy, enthusiasm and support.  The gathering consisted of men and women between the ages of 23 and 75 – a diverse group with some glaringly obvious common characteristics.  (For more on the New Superheroes, go HERE).  Last’s night gathering was a sharing of experiences, and what arose as most pressing for the group was:

A profound sense of knowing they are here for a reason  – ultimately to change the world, but wanting to know how! 

There was also a universal consensus that the time for knowing and acting on this reason is NOW! 

The time is now!

We are at a critical juncture in the evolution of humankind.  Fear, power and control are currently ruling the world resulting in the devastating destruction of our environment and threatening access to the very things we need to survive – namely healthy food, fresh water and clean air.  If things continue along the current trajectory, continuation of our species is certainly in question.  If there was ever a time that we need Superheroes – it is NOW!  The good news is that a powerful breed of humans has been born – men, women and children who KNOW what the world is SUPPOSED to look like, driven by a power within which causes them to FEEL when things in the world are NOT the way they are SUPPOSED to be and equally driven by this power within to SAY and DO something about it.  The Superheroes ARE NOT here to maintain status quo, they are here to CHANGE THE WORLD!  And yes, they will make those uncomfortable who are attached to the current paradigm of materialism, consumerism, gluttony, greed, envy, sloth, and pride, driven by a lust for power and a need for revenge.  The Superheroes are here to bear witness to the tearing down of the current paradigm that is already happening in our midst while preparing to help build the world anew – a world built on love, working in cooperation to establish peace, justice and harmony in our world where all perceived separations are set aside as we embrace the inherent oneness of not only humanity, but all of creation.

Moving Forward

In providing support for the Superheroes and helping them to achieve the purpose for which they were born, future gatherings will address some of the following:

1) Empathy – the gift of empathy inherent within the New Superheroes – how to understand it and how to use it to heal the world without harming one’s self.

2) Fear – learning how to transcend the fear of our gifts and our call – overcoming the inner obstacles to fulfilling our purpose.

3) Fear – dealing with the fear of others – knowing that by simply being in our presence, others will be awakened to their own true nature, to their desire for a better world, some will be able to accept this awakening, others will run in fear, often making us a target of their fear.

4) Fear – not getting drawn into a fearful response to the fear of the world.  Holding tight to the vision of love and letting go of the temptation to letting the media, etc. draw us away from love and into fear.

5) Managing our own Awakening – anxiety, depression, panic attacks, sleeplessness, physical discomfort, etc. can all be signs of Superheroes trying to wake up.  How do we manage our symptoms by accepting our call instead of repressing the call and making our symptoms worse?

6) Finding peace in the midst of the collapsing world.  In a word – spiritual practice!  Meditation, mindfulness, prayer, contemplation, mindful movement, and other activities that lead us to an experience of peace, joy, love, contentment, joy, fulfillment – all are helpful in supporting the call of the Superhero.

7) DISCERNMENT – what are our unique gifts and HOW are we being called to use them for the betterment of our world?

If you are a Superhero and living in the Oshkosh area, please join us:

Mondays 4:30 – 6:00pm

Please call or email for details on location (920) 230-1313 or


Posted in Authentic Freedom, Initiation, world changes

Are You One of the New Superheroes?

There is a new breed of humans who are currently walking the planet.  This new breed of humans were born to be Superheroes.  They are our future.  They are here to heal and change the world.  No, they won’t be faster than the speed of light (but with the internet…who knows!). They won’t be able to bend steel with their hands.  They will not be able to leap over capital T in a single bound.  They will not be able to stop bullets with their golden bracelets or coerce truth out of liars with a magical lasso.  The impact of the new Superheroes, however, will be just as great – if not greater.


Who are the new Superheroes?

Here is just a short list of qualities that might help you identify yourself, or someone you know as a new Superhero.  The New Superheroes are:

  • Born with a deep sense that they are here for a reason, that there is something they are here to do.
  • Born with a profound inner knowing of what the world is supposed to be like and dramatically and negatively affected when they witness or experience a world other than what they know is supposed to be.
  • Extremely sensitive to their environment, picking up the feelings and emotions of others, feeling like it is their job to fix things.  Also sensitive to world events – weather, natural disasters, human disasters, war, etc.
  • Struggling with anxiety, depression, panic attack, sleeplessness, insomnia.
  • Creatively driven with an active mind.
  • Often drawn to nature. Feel more grounded and whole after spending time in nature.
  • Not interested in the current Western paradigm of materialism and consumerism.
  • Dumbfounded that others don’t understand and expect the world to be as they know it should be and that no one seems to be doing anything about it.
  • Struggling with authority—feeling it has to be earned, not assumed.
  • Fiercely independent, don’t fit in with old systems of education, government, religion, etc., knowing a better way to do these things.

The Superhero’s Challenge

Again, the new  Superheroes are our future.  They are here to heal and change the world.  The problem is that the majority of the world is not quite ready for the Superheroes.  The world isn’t ready because many are too tightly attached to the world they have come to know and many are benefitting from current paradigm which is primarily rooted in separation and fear.  The new Superheroes are preaching about love….and as is usually the case, the world isn’t quite ready for love.  As a result, the new Superheroes:

  • Question themselves because of the contrast between what they know and what others seem to know and believe.  This questioning creates in them a great deal of anxiety, stress and they often lose sleep over this.
  • Experience a great amount of angst—over the state of the world, the environment, politics, and all of the above mentioned, and often feel helpless (even hopeless) about it.
  • Are restlessly discontent over all of the above – a discontent that is not satisfied until they are working toward the creation of the world they know in their hearts, their minds and their beings.
  • Are growing cynical over all of the above.


Help is on the Way

As a Superhero myself, I feel called to provide help and support for the New Superheroes!  Help for the Superhero in:

  • Learning to manage anxiety along with the depression and panic attacks that often accompany the Superhero’s awakening.
  • Discovering and cultivating their own unique Superhero powers.  (Many have been gifted with empathy and are unwittingly making themselves sick with other people’s emotions, illnesses and dramas. My job is to help them learn how to use this power and not get sickened by it.)
  • Protecting themselves from the kryptonite-effect of a world living in separation and fear.
  • Finding community – creating our own Justice League of Superheroes working together to heal and change the world. “Truth, Justice and Pizza”

WonderWomanIf you are a Superhero and looking for support, please join us on Monday, July 7, 2014 at 4:30 for our first gathering.  For more information, please click HERE, or call or email Lauri Lumby (aka Wonder Woman) (920) 230-1313,  The world is waiting for you!  You are the change you wish to see in the world! 

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Empowerment, God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Spiritual Practices, Truth, Virtual Church

Virtual Church Meditation Supplement – The Power of the Holy Spirit

Please find below “Agape” – the Authentic Freedom Virtual Church Meditation Supplement for Sunday, May 25, 2014. The topic this week is getting to know the Holy Spirit – the Power of God that awakens, catalyzes, directs and empowers.  Feel the Power.


Agape’ Meditation Practices Newsletter

Supplement to the Authentic Freedom Virtual Church Service


Scripture Reading:

Jesus said to his disciples: “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate to be with you always, the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot accept, because it neither sees nor knows him. But you know him, because he remains with you, and will be in you. I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you. In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me, because I live and you will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father and you are in me and I in you. Whoever has my commandments and observes them is the one who loves me. And whoever loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and reveal myself to him.”

John 14: 15-21



Additional Readings:

Acts 8: 5-7, 14-17

Ps 66: 1-7, 16, 20

1 Pt 3: 15-18


Exploring the Trinity

In this week’s reading, we begin our discussion of the Holy Spirit – the third Divine Person of the Trinity. In regards to the Trinity, Jesus spoke first about “the Father” the part of the Trinity that Jesus experienced as outside of him. Jesus experienced this aspect of God as intimately personal and loving, like a father, but not limited to masculine form. Secondly, Jesus experienced God within him and so much a part of him as if they were One. The Holy Spirit, is the aspect of God that moves and empowers. Jesus experienced the third person of the Trinity as flowing out of the love he knew between himself and the Father and that would inspire and activate those who followed his example and came to know the love that he hoped to implant in the world in the same way that the Holy Spirit had inspired and activated him. The Holy Spirit awakens us, inspires us and moves us to be love in the world and is like a fire that cannot be contained. The Holy Spirit is God seeking to be known in the world through us.

How have you experienced God outside of you, God within you and God seeking to be expressed through you?

How have you experienced the FIRE of the Holy Spirit?



Spiritual Practices:

In this week’s spiritual practice, you will have an opportunity to have a palpable experience of the Holy Spirit so that you can identify its Presence and Action in your life.

  1. Go you YouTube and find the song “The Power” by Amy Grant. Link here:
  2. Listen to the song one time listening attentively to the lyrics.
  3. Listen to the song again, this time, feeling the song with your body. Feel the rhythm of the music. Allow the music to literally move you…tap your feet, sway your arms, GET UP AND DANCE. J
  4. Listen again and allow yourself to be ONE with the music. Enter deeply into the song – lyrics, rhythm, even the silence between the notes. Feel the music as part of who you are. THIS is the Holy Spirit seeking to be known in and through you. Acknowledge it.
  5. Rest in silence and be attentive to any thoughts, emotions, images that may begin to arise.
  6. Write your thoughts and feelings in a notebook or journal.


Authentic Freedom

In Amy Grant’s song, The Power, she speaks of the aspect of God that “drives us crazy.” While Authentic Freedom doesn’t specifically address the topic of the Holy Spirit, the Holy Spirit can be thought of as the place within us that feels frustrated, impatient, angry, depressed and anxious when the truth of who God is asking us to be feels thwarted. When we are not living as the person God made us to be – peaceful, loving, compassionate, purposeful and fulfilled, the Holy Spirit lets us know and will continue to let us know until we do something about it. The Holy Spirit is like the fire breathing life into our truest self, driving it to seek after its fulfillment until it is satisfied. This is why we often feel “crazy” in the pursuit of our path, or as a dear spiritual brother calls it, “angsty!”

Where have you experienced the fire of the Holy Spirit through your own restlessness, impatience, frustration, angst, anger, anxiety and even depression?



Posted in Midlife Journey, Returning book

Women and Midlife

Between the ages of 30 and 70, women go through an important hormonal change which moves us beyond childbearing to the birth of ourselves.  By engaging in this process, we are brought fully into our personal and creative potential.  This journey is known by some a “midlife” or as one friend once said, “A dangerous opportunity!”

Windows to the Soul by Catherine E. Case
Windows to the Soul by Catherine E. Case


The first stage of the midlife journey is the awakening.  It is in the awakening that our hormones begin to shift, removing the veil that is necessary during the time of childbearing that keeps our attention focused on the survival of our children. As our children become viable, less dependent, more self-sufficient and our 100% attention no longer needs to be on them, the veil thins and our attention shift from birthing children to BIRTHING OURSELVES.  As many women who have not only survived, but triumphed in the midlife journey, the awakening is known by feeling, emotions, thoughts that initially disturb, but when tended to, help us to become more of who we were intended to be.  The “symptoms” of the awakening might include:

  • Feelings of Restlessness
  • Longing for something more
  • Feelings of being unfulfilled
  • Unnamed impatience, anger or rage
  • Restless or unhappy in your intimate relationships
  • Anxiety, Depression, Panic Attacks
  • Experiencing physical and emotional changes
  • Longing to be creative but not knowing how or with what
  • Yearning to reconnect with things from your childhood

What We Resist Persists

As many modern-day spiritual teachers have said, “what we resist persists.”  This is equally true for the midlife journey.  For many, the midlife journey begins in pain.  Our instinctual response to pain (discomfort, anxiety, fear, anger, depression, longing, yearning, restlessness) is to avoid it or to try to make it go away.  We can push it away all we want, but it will keep coming back and back and back, hounding us and increasing our discomfort until we LISTEN.  Instead of resisting the midlife journey and all its consequences, the invitation is to INVITE IT IN and to ENGAGE in the process.  When we allow ourselves to be present to our feelings, our longing, our restlessness, the still small voice of our truth can finally be heard.

What Our Truth Might Be Saying

The purpose of the midlife journey is the BIRTHING of ourselves.  It is through this process that our Divine gifts are recognized, cultivated and brought forth to be shared in the world.  It is the time when we get to do what WE want, spend time with what we enjoy, GET TO KNOW ourselves.  When we engage in the midlife journey, we might discover that we are really an introvert (and not the extrovert the world wants us to be) and that we need more solitude.  We might rediscover our childhood dreams and passions.  We might learn that we have talent as a painter or writer or that we love cooking and entertaining.  We might rediscover the sexual passions that took a backseat while we were tending to our children’s needs.  We might hear the call to return to school to pursue a new career.  The point is that the midlife journey is not hear to torture us and make us feel horrible.  Instead, the midlife journey is here to draw us into a more fulfilling, creative, expansive, enjoyable life.

For support in your own midlife journey, watch for my new book, Returning – A Woman’s Midlife Journey to Herself.  The book provides a map as well as exercises through which you can engage your own midlife process. 



Posted in Authentic Freedom, Initiation, Spiritual Formation

Tested in Fire

Once we step onto the path of awakening, enlightenment, spiritual growth, consciousness, self-awareness (or whatever you want to call it), we are forever changed.  And, it is not a journey for the faint of heart!


Who will endure the day of his coming?

Who can stand when he appears?

For he is like the refiner’s fire,

or like the fuller’s lye.

He will sit refining and purifying silver,

And he will purify the sons of Levi,

Refining them like gold or like silver…

Malachi 3: 3-4a

Defining the “God Path”

Some people call it the path of enlightenment, others awakening, others being saved, others consciousness, others self-awareness.  I call it the God Path.  When we heed the restlessness and longing in our soul and begin the search for its remedy, we are on the God Path.  For most, the search for the remedy to this inner restlessness, longing and impatience begins outside … looking for the perfect job, partner, house, STUFF, that will quell this longing.  Eventually, we find that the external search produces NOTHING or worse, more longing and restlessness.  At some point, some give up and surrender to a life of quiet desperation.  The courageous, however, continue the search which eventually leads them WITHIN…to the only place where that longing might be satisfied.  I call this the God Path because it is God (consciousness, higher self, highest truth, Presence, Being) that we find within.  And it is God who is the source of our longing…..calling us HOME.

The God Path Requires ENDURANCE

As the prophet Malachi observed, the God Path is not for the faint of heart and requires a tremendous amount of endurance.   Endurance is required because on the God Path, every fear, ego-attachment, false perception reveals itself and asks for our attention so that it can be healed, transcended and released.  If money is one of our attachments, it will show up.  If we cling to power, status or fame, it will be IN OUR FACE.  If we do not believe we are worthy of love, our unworthiness will show up again and again and again until we remember that we are already LOVE, that love does not have to be earned, neither does it have to be taken away. If we have forgotten that we are uniquely gifted to reveal God in the world and if we have withheld these gifts from the world, we will be confronted by anxiety, depression, rage.  If we have harbored resentment toward another, forgiveness will elude us.  Again and again and again our fears and attachments will show themselves so that we can face them and do the work of moving through them so that we can be the WHOLE person God created us to be.

Help Along the Path

Authentic Freedom – Claiming a Life of Contentment and Joy provides tools to help you along the God Path.  It does so by illuminating the seven core fears that you will face along the path and presenting tools to help you heal and transcend these fears.  Through Authetic Freedom, we discover that forewarned is forearmed and we enter into the God Path armed with the resources we need to confront the fears, ego attachments and false perceptions as they present themselves to us.  Authentic Freedom presents the same tools used by our greatest spiritual teachers in their own journey along the God Path – Jesus, Moses, The Buddha, Krishna, Mohammed and others.

Personal Support

Because the God Path requires endurance and will test us like gold tested in fire, it is  helpful to have a personal guide along the path.  This personal guidance is the role of a Spiritual Director.  It is a Spiritual Director’s job to be a source of support for us along the path, to provide encouragement and also an objective presence to help us to see those things that may be lurking in the darkness – our unresolved ego attachments, the way we project our fears and attachments on to others, our resistance to the path that God may be laying out for us.  It is the responsibility of a Spiritual Director to help us hear the truth beyond our words and to see the light that is shining where we might see only darkness.  The role of a Spiritual Director is at once listener, coach and spiritual butt-kicker.

Rewarded for our Endurance

While the journey is not easy, the rewards are terrific.  For those who choose the God path and stick with it, there is fulfillment, contentment, love, joy and peace and the ability to endure the ups and downs of the human condition without being destroyed.  The God path provides for us the tools to transcend the fears, false perceptions and suffering of the human condition and to find the peace that resides in the midst of it all.  In choosing the God path, we find that heaven, nirvana, the kingdom of God is RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW and not on some planet light years away.

For support along the God Path, contact Lauri Lumby at (920) 230-1313 or lauri@yourspiritualtruth.  Or click on Services to learn more.

Posted in Discernment, Lessons

Truth Tantrums

As we move along the path of spiritual growth toward awakening and enlightenment, we grow in our ability to perceive, but more importantly, believe our truth.  Today’s blog reveals some of the dramatic ways in which truth will try to get our attention if we attempt to ignore or deny it. (PS for more on discerning truth, read chapters 7-9 of my book, Authentic Freedom – Claiming a Life of Contentment and Joy.) 



I Can See Clearly Now

Recently, a slew of truths have been revealed (or should I say confirmed?) to me.   These are the kinds of truths that would have a dramatic affect in anyone’s life should they also be faced with these truths.  Confirmation of these truths brought forth grief and I am grateful for the gifts of a benevolent universe that provided the space and the perfect companion with whom I could process through this grief, while providing a shoulder on which she too could process her own grief.  I know that the processing of these truths will continue to unfold, but as I stand either in the middle or on the other side of these truths, I can clearly see how my own inner self had been trying to get me to recognize and acknowledge these truths all along.  


Sneaking Suspicions

As I look back over the past several years, glimpses of these “newly revealed” truths have been present for a VERY LONG time.  A feeling in my gut, a sense that something was not right, questions answered with veiled responses, challenges met with protest or harsh condemnation…..all these were signposts to truths wanting to be known, but either denied, repressed or ignored.  Some point along this path came the doubt and the question of “Am I just crazy, irrational, untrusting?”  “Maybe I’m just bored and picking a fight.”  “It must be my fault, and my insanity…because that’s what they are saying.”  But then the sneaking sensation in my gut never went away and the feeling of unease simply increased.  Then came the tantrum….the truth stomping its feet and waving its hands…PAY ATTENTION…SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT IN DENMARK!!!!!


Truth Tantrums

This is probably not the case with all situations of depression and panic attack disorder, but when I look back with the 20/20 vision of hindsight, I now understand the TRUTH that was trying to get my attention.  Since I wasn’t paying attention to the more subtle clues of truth (or I wasn’t emotionally ready to handle the consequences of knowing these truths), my truth had to get louder, more forceful, it had to have a tantrum…and it sure did.  First was the FULL BLOWN panic attack…heart pounding, body trembling, sweat dripping, floor pacing, “I must be crazy” or “I’m having a heart attack and I’m going to die.”  If you’ve ever had a panic attack….you know what I mean.  If you haven’t, trust me when I say you DON’T want to know! Follow that up with a week-long, bed ridden migraine (migraines always follow panic attack for me).  Apparently that wasn’t enough…so here comes the DEPRESSION.  Blech.  Fast forward a few years after successful attempts to “control” the panic through alternative medicine, talk therapy, Spiritual Direction and a WHOLE LOT of inner work….but I still wasn’t listening (or emotionally ready).  After a life-changing, international, spiritual pilgrimage, my truth decided to redouble her efforts.  I SAW… KNEW… BELIEVED the truth that was trying to reveal itself to me while on this pilgrimage…but instead of acting (apparently still not emotionally ready) I went right back to my “normal” life.  To this I was awakened EVERY MORNING at 2am to the joyful  (I say this with sarcasm) experience of a full blown panic attack.  WAKE UP LAURI…..TIME TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE TRUTH.     Panic attack.  Migraines.  Depression….all vehicles through which the truth was trying to get my attention.  OK OK….I’m paying attention. 


What if we believed?

Prior to recent revelations, these truths have only been suspicions.  I had no validation, verification or affirmation of these truths.  All I could go on was a hunch and a prayer.  But now that all has been confirmed….I can look back in wonder at the dramatic ways in which our truth will try to get our attention….what would happen if we paid attention from the beginning?   What would happen if we trusted and believed in our truth instead of denying, questioning and doubting it?  I think from now on I will pay closer attention to my truth…it sure proved to be right!

Where have you had suspicions, a gut feeling, a sense of a truth or untruth trying to be revealed?

How have you responded to these intuitive clues?

How might you begin to listen more attentively to the subtle cues of truth?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries

Posted in Authentic Freedom, Lessons, Surrender

Saying Yes to What God Gives Me II

As we move through our journey of spiritual growth toward self-awakening and enlightentment, one of the lessons we are invited to embrace along the path is the lesson of surrender.  Today’s blog explores the invitation to surrender to what the universe puts in our path, or as I say, “Saying Yes to What God Gives Me.”



Here I am, back from a week in Lumbyland.  Dad’s surgery has been postponed until September, so the kids (my two, plus one) and I embraced a week of Minneapolis and Lake Lumby activities.  We returned on Thursday EXHAUSTED and a little sick of eachother. We retreated to our respective corners and now it is Monday….I should be bright eyed and bushy tailed and ready to get back to work….RIGHT?????   WRONG!  Apparently the Universe has other plans.  In the past, I would have pushed through this energy of “something other than what I had planned in my pragmatic, goal-orientted mind” and forged ahead with what I WANT.  One of my teachers refers to this tendency as “PUSH.”  The good news is that I have learned (mostly the hard way), that pushing against the Universe does nothing but give you a headache and a big pile of failed attempts.  When we push against the flow of the Universe, the flow of our highest path, our highest good, we get nothing but YUCK.  So, this morning, I throw my hands up in surrender and accept what the Universe has planned for this week.


Trusting in Highest Good

This invitation to surrender is one of the hardest things for us to do, especially in our Western, capitalistic, hierarchical, patriarchical, pragmatic, goal-oriented society.  We are taught to set a goal and work our tails off until it happens…OR we won’t get the money we need to live, to buy the stuff that society says we should have, or the investments necessary to rest from all this work when we finally get to the finish line – retirement.  Ha!  This mindset is founded upon two primary fears – There is not enough, and I am alone (in other words, I have to do it!).  In my book, Authentic Freedom, I explore these fears in depth and present the remedies to healing these fears.  For today, suffice it to say that these fears are both LIES and that there is another mindset that we are invited to embrace if we want to have peace and joy in our lives.  Embracing this other mindset is founded upon a basic truth that our Western society doesn’t want us to know:  There is a higher order that is always at work for our highest good.  Gulp!  Breathe!  Breathe again.  I know, pretty radical stuff……the question is, can we believe it?  Can we actually take the risk in believing that there is a benevolent something that is always working for our highest good and seeks to reveal that highest good to us and lead us toward it?  Can we?


A Rose by Any Other Name

Now, what do we call that something?  I call it “God.”  Some might call it “Higher Self.”  Others might call it “The Universe.”  And others, “So-Hum.”  And know that when I say “God” I’m not talking about the old man in the sky God…I’m talking about that something that transcends all human descriptions, definitions or attempts to describe.  It is that something that continues to reveal itself through all of creation, including ourselves.  It is the energy that informs, moves, animates all of reality and is the Source of all that is and ever will be.  What it is exactly, I do not know….but I know it is really cool, filled with love and light and darkness and draws us, leads us, empowers us, compels us to seek, to know and to become the most magnificent vision of ourselves that we could ever imagine…rooted in love, joy, compassion, bliss and peace.  Cool, right? 


Saying Yes

So, if we can really take that risk and attempt to embrace the belief that there is a benevolent something that is always at work for our highest good, then we can surrender.  We can resist our temptation to cling to the fears that tend to put us into PUSH mode and believe that we can simply relax into the flow of the universe and allow that flow to carry us to exactly where we need to be.  AHHHHHH!  It seems that for me, instead of a heavy push toward money making projects and activities, I’m being invited to something else.  All the work is done that can be done (for now) on my creative projects and these are now in the hands of other support people.  Instead, it seems I am being invited to surrender to a week of re-entry.  And to this I reply, “Universe (Calgon), take me away.” 


Where are you tempted to engage PUSH energy?

Do you believe in a benevolent “something” always at work for your higher good?

Where are you being invited to surrender?

Lauri Lumby

Authentic Freedom Ministries