My dear sisters and brothers,
As I mentioned in our spiritual service on Friday, there is a great turmoil approaching – one even greater than what we have experienced before. The death throes of the old world are even more palpable than before which I am currently feeling in every cell of my body in the form of an underlying anxiety that is most definitely NOT my own. I have nothing to be anxious about in my personal life which means it can only be coming forth from the world at large.
I recently heard myself saying, somewhat jokingly, but not really, that if a certain outcome happens in November that “I am going underground.” Then two things struck me:
- No matter the outcome in November, mass chaos will prevail, and from November 3rd until likely mid-January there will be a great wailing and gnashing of teeth. I don’t like to suggest doomsday, but it may be a good idea to be prepared in the event of massive civil unrest and the initiation of martial law.
- Why am I waiting until November to go underground and what exactly does underground mean to me?
While I have no control over the outcome and the consequences of November, I am in complete control over how I choose to live my life. Underground has always sounded good to me – who doesn’t want to live in a cave in the woods? While I’m not currently living in the woods and there are no caves nearby, and it is unlikely that I will be moving location anytime soon; none of this prevents me from creating my own underground in the world in which I am currently living.
Underground begins with a few simple steps:
- Unplugging from any activity, relationship, endeavor, etc. that are no longer life-giving.
- Eliminating those things which drain me emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
- Examining my Soul for those things that nourish, support and enliven me, and then making these a priority.
- Setting boundaries around my time and my use of time.
- Saying no to people, activities, etc. which are not life-giving.
- Being open to TRIBE. Watching for those of similar resonance and connecting with this individuals as a source of mutual honor, respect and support.
- Have my doomsday team on speed-dial – those I know I can call on (and visa versa) when I hit the wall or am about to have a meltdown.
- Clearing my field of anything that takes me away from my own well-cultivated field of inner peace and contentment.
- Be open to how my Soul is being called to serve and doing it.
- Saying NO to any societal conditioning, expectations, etc. that are not in resonance with my own truth.
- Living my own truth, unapologetically.
As it turns out, going underground is really my own way of creating the world I want to live in in the midst of the insanity and instability of a dying world. Building our own world is first an inside job – we have to feel it inside of ourselves first. Our new world becomes a reality when we begin to choose that which supports the inner contentment, peace and fulfillment we have cultivated within. We don’t need the world to be finished with its dying before choosing our new world and living in it. We simply need to choose it each and every moment of each and every day. If I could give an image to my own new world and what underground looks like to me, it would be something like this:
What does your new world look like and how can you begin to choose it?
Good morning sisters and brothers. After a rough couple days, I awoke this morning feeling somewhat back to my abnormal self. 🙂 The energy for the past few days has been exceedingly disruptive and I found myself caught up in the yuk – not on purpose – I just couldn’t NOT feel the tremor of fear that raged across our planet. A certain someone is supposed to pay a visit to Kenosha, Wisconsin today and there is much trepidation about the increasing division that his words might ignite. I am roughly 100 miles from Kenosha, in Oshkosh, WI so the anxiety is palpable.
This anxiety is simply one more symptom in a long line of symptoms of our dying world. That which has been hiding in the shadows (racism, classism, supremacy cults, the dark web, organized hate groups, violence, hatred, ignorance, etc. etc. etc.) continues to come out to be seen and it is HORRIBLE. The potential for evil that dwells within humanity is appearing to be infinite. And for those “of the good,” IT IS EXHAUSTING and disheartening.
In the face of all this evil, it is good to remember, this is nothing new! This evil and hatred for “the (perceived) other” has always been present. We simply live at a time that has fed these evils and that has allowed them to thrive – albeit in the darkness. Then a few years back something happened that invited them all to come out and play – and be seen. On many days, it seems as if a war is waging in the heavens between “the evil” and “the good” and we are the unwitting pawns in this game. I can assure you, such is not the case, but knowing this doesn’t change how it feels. We are definitely experiencing the depths of the YUK. The sad thing is that this is a YUK of our own making and has absolutely nothing to do with that which some might call “God.”
This is why I often say, “Human beings suck. I’m glad I’m not one of them.” I say this (somewhat) tongue in cheek – but in many ways this is true. Human beings, while perfect as Divine creations, are also broken and flawed. Broken by the original wound of separation and then further broken by other wounded human beings. We are all wounded in some way – some are simply wounded more than others. What we call “evil” is the consequence of unacknowledged and unhealed brokenness. This means that the “evil” can be healed.
When I look out over our broken world and ponder the healing of all this evil, I become overwhelmed and shutdown. It seems an impossible task. (It is an impossible task) I have learned that the world is not mine to heal. I used to think it was, but not anymore. I have come to understand that the only person we can truly heal is OURSELVES. Part of healing ourselves includes letting go of all the things outside of ourselves we believe we are responsible for healing. Like the story of the oxygen masks on airplanes. If the plane is going down, you have to grab your own mask first before helping your neighbor with theirs.
Saving ourselves does not mean we do not have compassion for our dying world. Neither does it mean we refuse assistance for those seeking help. We help the world heal itself by first healing ourselves. As we do this, those close to us begin to heal and transform. The more authentic and whole we are with ourselves, the more those around us feel safe to do the same. This healing begins to ripple out from us to the people we meet, the encounters we have in the world and the gifts we share with those who are ready to receive. Saving the world begins by saving ourselves and keeping the focus on our own healing and wellbeing. The rest simply unfolds from there.
This doesn’t mean that Lauri Lumby in Oshkosh Wisconsin by her simple acts of kindness will get a white supremacist to lay down his gun, but it might inspire the next generation to look for non-violent ways to resolve perceived conflict, or to work to eradicate the social injustices that inspire hate in the first place. At the end of the day, all the angry voices are simply people who did not feel seen or heard somewhere along the way or who did not get their basic needs for food, clothing, shelter, safety and love adequately met. Angry and hateful people are simply very sad people in disguise.
As the world (as we have known it) continues in its death march, growing louder and more angry as it reaches its ultimate demise, we would do well for ourselves to remember a few things:
- Keep our head down!
- Stay out of the fray!
- Heal ourself!
- Care for our own!
- When tempted to meet hate with hate, remember the deep woundedness that created all this evil and PRAY FOR THEM!
When facing times like these, I find myself drawn back to my Catholic roots, especially to the intercession (support) of the saints. Mother Mary, in particular is one I turn to. When invoking her support, I pray these words. Perhaps you will feel inspired to do the same:
Hail Mary, Full of Grace.
Love is with you.
Blessed art thou among women
And Blessed is the fruit of your Love.
Holy Mary, Mother of Love.
Pray for us.
Now and at the hour or our death.
I Buried Her
Copyright Lauri Ann Lumby
Yesterday I buried
the part of me that
was made to feel shame.
A shame that was never my own –
but the projection of another’s
Understanding it was
never anything I had done
or failed to do:
I buried her.
Placing her head-down
in a grave six-feet deep.
I lay a single rose
atop her grave,
shook the dirt off my hands,
“THIS is exactly what we are facing today as a human collective. What world do we want to live in? What world are we choosing for ourselves? Are we going to hitch our wagon to the dying world and accompany it in its death or are we going to choose the (as yet unknown) path to a new world – a new kind of human experience. It is a battle both within us, among us and outside of us. The decision that we make for ourselves will then determine the world we will be living in.”
Good morning sisters and brothers,
As many of you know, on Monday I got SLAMMED by a major energy push that resulted in vertigo, nausea and a 6 day migraine. UGH! In typical Lauri fashion I had to ask every question about what I could possibly have done wrong to warrant such a migraine? Is it the medication I’m taking and the recent dosage increase? Is it the weight I gained when hitting menopause (and helped along by the Covid shutdown). Am I getting enough exercise? Is it something I’m eating (or drinking)? The weather? Allergies? Some deep wound that is trying to find its way out? Any of the above? None of the above? Sigh!
After several days of self-flagellating, moaning in pain and feeling sorry for myself, and then a few more days of punishing myself for “not being productive,” I did a DEEP DIVE and discovered one thing:
I DID NOTHING WRONG
Yes, this nothing wrong had something to do with an old wound trying to find its way out, but the more I tried to “work” on that wound the more there was truly nothing to do. I simply had to see it and then let it be.
More importantly, the nothing wrong that I did, had absolutely NOTHING to do with me and
EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THE WORLD ON FIRE
Literally and figuratively. As the literal fires burn around our world (prayers for all those in the line of these fires!), the world as we have known it is going up in flames. The world that we have known, based in fear/power/oppression/and control is burning itself to the ground. Can you feel it? If this week’s “migraine” is any example, the world as we have known it is at war with itself. And it hurts!
If you think things have been bad (thank you Covid-19), just wait. They are about to get a whole lot worse. The energies of this inner war have been amping up all year and are not even close to reaching their climax. If you are sensitive at all, you are feeling the heightened tensions in our world, the increasing division, the fear and anxiety about what is up ahead. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but “up ahead” is no picnic! In fact, it’s about to get really ugly:
- Our kids are going back to school. If this doesn’t terrify you, you have not been paying attention. We are about to embark on one of the biggest social experiments in our human history. We are sending 56.6 million (not including college) students back to school, along with their teachers and staff. We have absolutely no idea if this is a good idea or a REALLY BAD idea and we have ZERO clue about the consequences of this decision. As a mother whose children were once that age (thank God they are now adults) I cannot help but wonder if we are sending our lambs to the slaughter. We might find that nothing happens or that something horrible will happen. Either way, if you aren’t nervous about school starting, perhaps you should be!
- The U.S. Presidential Race. OMG! What a shit show! It doesn’t matter on what side of the political fence you lean; it is all chaos! Whether it is the fight over mail in ballots, obstacles to voting, the Covid-19 fears about voting in person, or the simple fight over who is a better man (?????) to run our nation, it is all insanity. As one who for the past many presidential elections has voted democrat, I enjoyed many of the speeches of the Democratic National Convention, but I also felt the wave of reaction from those who lean toward “the other side.” I also felt (and heard) the crying out from those who are looking for even more radical reform than a middle of the road Democratic ticket will produce (if any). I can also feel (palpably) the RNC readying their response. The image I keep getting is that of stressed out monkeys in a cage who are flinging poo at each other. Did I mention it’s a shit show? Literally!
- The Battle in Our Collective Consciousness – This, is perhaps the most painful while also being the most subtle. I liken this battle to the same one I have repeatedly witnessed in those who are dying (or facing the possibility of death). There is a profound moment where on a very deep spiritual and unconscious level, their Soul is deciding whether to stay or if they should go. It is a deeply invisible and personal process that I have had the privilege of witnessing. I have never seen the moment of decision, but I have seen them in the process of making that decision. The result of that decision shows itself in either the person “giving up the ghost” or making an often difficult but no-less miraculous return.
Our Personal Choice:
THIS is exactly what we are facing today as a human collective. What world do we want to live in? What world are we choosing for ourselves? Are we going to hitch our wagon to the dying world and accompany it in its death or are we going to choose the (as yet unknown) path to a new world – a new kind of human experience. It is a battle both within us, among us and outside of us. The decision that we make for ourselves will then determine the world we will be living in.
Readying Ourselves for that Choice
But before we are able to make that choice, we have to arm ourselves against the increasing hysteria that will accompany the current world in its death throes! Like the deeply invisible work of the Soul in its decision for life or death, we have to turn inward. We have to go deep within ourselves……AWAY from the insanity of the dying world. Think of it like one in the hospital constantly being poked, prodded, and assessed by nurses and doctors and how much of a distraction that is from the deep inner work needed to arrive at a choice. The same is true for us. We need to UNPLUG from the world “out there,” stay out of the fray of the battle, let those who need to battle throw their shit and BY GOD……STAY OUT OF THE LINE OF FIRE! Inserting ourselves into the battle will only get us covered in shit. Instead:
- Go inward.
- Be still.
- Be quiet.
- Exercise patience.
- Trust in the unfolding of the Universe and the Divine plan for love.
- Resist the temptation to engage.
- Pray. Pray. Give your energy to love and share that love with a world profoundly in need of it.
- Connect with your tribe.
- Return to nature.
- Engage in creativity.
- Keep life simple.
It is only out of this quiet simplicity that our Soul decision can be made. What is the world we want to live in? What does it look like? How does it feel?
As the world around us implodes upon itself, stay focused on the world of your Soul’s choosing and make every decision in support of that world. As the world around you crumbles, behold your chosen world rising from among the ashes – not because some outside perceived authority (ie a President) made it happen, but because you did!