Posted in detachment, Surrender

God Doesn’t Care – So Why Do We?

A quick heads up: This blog may trigger you in the area of your attachments.  Please be patient and read through to the end….I promise there’s a happy ending! 

Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing

there is a field…

I’ll meet you there.

– Rumi

Detachment is perhaps one of the greatest skills we can develop in our journey toward wholeness and peace. As Jesus is quoted as saying in Paul Ferrini’s book, I am the Door, “judgment is the original sin.” It is our judgment of things that is the cause of our suffering.  Jesus says the same about judgment in scripture, “Judge not lest ye be judged.”  When we judge experiences, situations, things, ourselves or other people as good or bad, we create separation which then causes suffering.  Instead, we are invited to gaze upon our human experiences from the position of objective observer, trading our judgment for curiosity and wonder, and our tendency to separate for union. When we judge we separate.  When we cease from judging we join.

Jesus taught us that Oneness is our Source and our origin. After coming to understand and then embody this Oneness within himself, Jesus then set out to teach this to others.  Oneness within himself.  Oneness with others.  Oneness with all of creation.  Oneness with that which he called God.  Oneness, as Jesus explained, can only be known when we pierce through the veil of perceived separation – setting down our tendency to judge, setting down our tendency to separate, even setting down our desire to care.

Caring can only arise out of judgment, which then leads us down the path of suffering. Caring arises when we judge something as good or bad (usually bad).  Caring then causes us to take up our sword in response to that which we have decided we have to fix, heal, change, or defend ourselves against.  (I am especially guilty of this in my former attempts to reform or change the Catholic Church or in my many attempts at keeping myself safe from a broken heart).  Profound freedom arises when we are able to cease from caring and simply let things be.

This is what God does. God does not care.  In “His/Her” great love, God gave us the radically liberating gift of free will.  In this, we are free to be and act and think and believe anything we want – and God doesn’t care.  God doesn’t judge our thoughts, our actions, or our beliefs as good or bad.  God simply watches in curious wonder – joining (loving) us through whatever choices we make.  By natural law, we experience the consequences of our choices, but these consequences do not come from God.  Instead, in the mind and heart of God, we are loved without condition.  No matter what we do or how we act, we are loved.  God might find it interesting that we would choose fear over love, judgment over acceptance, suffering over peace, but God doesn’t care.  God does not seek to change or alter who we are or what we choose.  Instead, God allows us the freedom to learn it for ourselves.  The same is true of the actions of our world.  God doesn’t care.  God stands back in curious wonder over the choices human beings make and the consequences we create for ourselves out of these choices.  But still, God doesn’t care.  God does not seek to change or alter our choices; allowing us the radical freedom of learning (or not learning) for ourselves.

Jesus told a story which reveals God’s unconditional love and the powerful gift of free will that arose out of this love. This story has come to be known as the Story of the Prodigal Son. In this story, a father (playing the role of God) has two sons.  The youngest son asks for his share of his inheritance early so that he can leave the perceived safety and security of his father’s home to go out into the world and find his own way.  Loving the son freely and without condition, the father agrees, knowing that the son’s choices may lead him down an uncomfortable path, but allowing him the freedom to risk failure so that he might learn and grow (or not).  The son chooses all sorts of experiences that might be thought of as opposite what his father might wish for him and he suffers the consequences of his choices.  He eventually learns that it is in separating from his father (God) that his choices caused him suffering, so he (humbled and exhausted) chooses to go home, hoping his father might forgive him and allow him back into union with him.  Not only does the father welcome him back, not once does he inflict judgment, reproach, criticism or condemnation on his son.  He accepts him with nothing but love.  When the son asks for forgiveness, it is the son who needs to forgive himself from choosing separation over union.  In the father’s eyes, there is nothing to forgive.  Even if the son had continued to choose separation, it seems the father would still love him, waiting for the day that life would beat him down enough that he might, just might, risk the peace of union over the suffering of separation.

Jesus told this story to explain to his disciples what God is like. God does not care.  If God doesn’t care, than why do we?  (Stay tuned next week for an invitation to caring that is free from judgment, perceived separation and suffering.)





I am a trained, professional Spiritual Director, Author and Hands-on Healer. I offer services, programs and classes that empower you to hear the voice of the Divine that speaks from within you. It is the voice of the Divine that leads us to our highest truth, to the discovery and cultivation of our gifts and to a life of Authentic Freedom where we know contentment, compassion and joy. Your truth will set you free!

5 thoughts on “God Doesn’t Care – So Why Do We?

  1. I agree with you, Lauri…and furthermore…if I remember correctly, the returning son actually does not even ask for forgiveness…he simply states how sinful he was in hopes of getting a better situation than he was in…hoping his father would allow him to be a lowly servant. (In a way, he is still “conniving”…trying to work a better deal for himself.) So…if true…forgiveness is a given. We actually don’t even need to ask for it! Like when Jesus forgave from the cross…forgiving those who killed him when they hadn’t asked for forgiveness (“They don’t know what they do”). That’s unconditional love, right?! It’s we who punish ourselves by thinking we are “unforgivable”. When we are forgiven when we don’t deserve it…that can be life-changing. I’ve experienced that in my life!

  2. While you appear to have a fairly good perspective of what many have come to believe about our God; you seem to lack the understanding that in the process of loving people, caring is a very essential ingredient. God our father still remains a loving caring father. He cares what choices we make. He just doesn’t step in and alter them. He wants to know that when we turn to Him that it is Our choice and not Him forcing us to do so. So to say God doesn’t care what we do is not totally correct. His lack of forcing is not a form of not caring. All decent parents know this. They know that their children need to know they are cared for by their parents. So caring is inherently instilled in parents by God. We didn’t learn to be this way on our own. So to say God doesn’t care is to teach heresy. Yes judgment divides but scripture also tells us that if a person strays from God that we are to approach them and try to guide them back gently. if they continue to chose a bad path then we are to bring other members to help show them the path. If they persist on going their own way then you have done your duty and God will pass judgment on them at judgment day. Only God knows and understands our hearts and why we do what we do. So there is a difference between correction and judgment. One can be done out of love and the other done to be controlling or vengeful. God operates out of Love and wants us to do the same.

    1. Caroline,
      Two things: 1) Did you read part II? In this I speak of the distinction between judgment and caring. Please read it if you have not.
      2) As I mentioned in the preview of this blog, this post is likely to trigger readers in their areas of attachment. By accusing me of heresy, you are revealing your own judgment of those who believe differently than you do along with your attachment to a specific image and belief in the Divine. This is cool! I have no attachment to what you do or do not believe about God. Whatever gives you peace is exactly what you need, and in this you are blessed. I hold you in love and acceptance for exactly where you are in your spiritual journey and beliefs. And I agree with you that we are created in the image and likeness of God and when we act out of our truest nature as love, as God is love, then we act in loving ways…love is the natural consequence of realizing and being the love God created us to be. Thank you for sharing your perspectives. I suspect many who read this blog resonate with what you have shared.

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