As we usher in the new world, a new model of intimate human relationship is being called forth. In the new world we move beyond co-dependency (looking for the other to complete us) to interdependency, or what I call Beloved (or Sacred) Partnership.
Beloved Partnership is known by two healthy and whole individuals (or at the very least, two working toward wholeness) who are coming together in partnership as sources of mutual honor, respect and support for each other. In Beloved Partnership, both partners work toward achieving their own greatness and reaching their fullest potential, while supporting the other in doing the same.
Abraham Maslow (Motivation and Personality, 1970, pp. 181- 202), identified the following as characteristics of beloved partnership (what he called the self-actualized relationship):
- A partnership where there is a mutual giving and receiving of love, both parties are equally able and willing to engage in both giving and receiving.
- A healthy sexuality rooted in and reflective of love – more creative, ecstatic, orgasmic and fulfilling, yet also less about attachment. It is not a needy kind of intimacy, but instead is mutually fulfilling.
- Pooling of needs – your needs, wants, desires, become mine and visa versa – such that there becomes one hierarchy of needs with two people seeking after their fulfillment.
- Fun, merriment, joy, spontaneity, elation, feelings of well-being.
- Mutual honor and respect of the other’s individual gifts, talents, drive, passions, interests, temperament, etc.
- Mutual, authentic admiration, wonder and awe.
- Detachment and Individuality – able to be in relationship without compromising one’s own individuality.
Barbara Marx Hubbard (Conscious Evolution, 2015, pp. 238 – 239) says this about Beloved Partnership (what she called the co-creative couple):
Now we become the co-creative couple, which begins when both partners achieve within themselves at least the beginning of a balance between the masculine and feminine, the animus and the anima. It begins when the woman’s initiative and vocational need is received in love by the feminine receptivity of her partner. When she is loved for her more masculine side, she falls in love with the man’s feminine aspect, for what she needs is the nurturance of her own strength and creativity. She loves him for his receptivity. He no longer has to prove himself by control and domination. He can bring forth his own creativity without aggression. And she can express her strength without fear of losing him. Whole being joins with whole being, recreating the family at the next stage of evolution. Same-sex couples experience a similar process of integration and joining to emancipate each other (p. 238).
Authentic Freedom Academy provides support for both new couples hoping to build Beloved Partnership and for existing couples who find themselves at the stage of needing to re-negotiate a relationship that may have been established on the former model of co-dependency (wanting the other to complete us).
To learn more about Beloved Partnership support, contact Lauri Ann Lumby (920) 230-1313 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.