Posted in Authentic Freedom, Midlife Journey

Choosing Not To Choose

In yesterday’s blog, I wrote about the courage necessary to fully embrace the birth of our Soul – the uniquely creative way in which we have been gifted to find meaning, purpose, connection and fulfillment in our lives and through which we contribute to the betterment of the world.  Midlife and Menopause often usher in the process of birthing our Soul, and the end result is simply a matter of choice.  What happens, however, when either we feel as if we cannot choose something other than what we currently know, or we feel as if choosing the path of our Soul would cause ourselves or others too much pain?  In these scenarios, sometimes the choice is not to choose.

Choosing Not to Choose

One of my all time favorite songs about the Authentic Freedom journey is Freewill, by Rush.  In this song, Geddy Lee addresses the truth that sometimes our choice is not to choose:

“If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”


This decision not to choose is equally available to us in the birth of our Soul.  Some aren’t even aware that they have a choice.  They believe that life is “what it is” and have no conscious thought that life could be any different.  For others, the decision not to choose is made out of a perception that the choice of the Soul is not available to them.  They feel as if they do not have the time, money, support, resources, environment, freedom to choose the path of their Soul.  This is where the Authentic Freedom process provides tools through which one might overcome the perceptions around this choice.  For some, however, the decision not to choose is real because they do not have the freedom (or the civil liberties) to make such a choice, and do not feel called to risk their own lives and the lives of their families for that choice.  For many, the decision not to choose is a completely conscious decision based in the knowledge of the consequences of such a choice.  They know the consequences of the path of their Soul might mean freedom for themselves, but they are also conscious of the impact of their choices on the people around them.  Sometimes we choose not to choose because we do not want to hurt or harm the people around us.

Finding Peace in Deciding Not to Choose

In the Authentic Freedom process and philosophy, we acknowledge that authentic freedom, a life of enduring inner peace, contentment and joy, is independent of the external circumstances of our lives.  As such, we can absolutely choose NOT to choose the path of our Soul and still know peace.   In choosing not to choose, one is not doomed to a life of quiet desperation.  Without proper tools for managing the ever-restless Soul, the outcome might be quiet desperation, and this is where Authentic Freedom, and other approaches, which include mindfulness based practices, come in handy.  Whether we choose the path of our Soul or choose not to decide, we have access to age-old practices which have now been scientifically proven to cultivate and deepen contentment, peace and joy within us.

Lauri Lumby works with people one-on-one and in groups to help them connect with the mindfulness practices that work best for them and to then help them to establish a mindfulness discipline which helps them to cultivate inner peace, contentment and joy.  To schedule your own mentoring session, call (920) 230-1313 or email


I am a trained, professional Spiritual Director, Author and Hands-on Healer. I offer services, programs and classes that empower you to hear the voice of the Divine that speaks from within you. It is the voice of the Divine that leads us to our highest truth, to the discovery and cultivation of our gifts and to a life of Authentic Freedom where we know contentment, compassion and joy. Your truth will set you free!