Posted in Being Human, Freedom, Inspiration, Lessons, Spiritual Practices


Today’s blog explores loneliness – the addictions and compulsions we indulge to either run from or avoid the spiritual pain of loneliness – the ultimate spiritual purpose of loneliness and how we can find its cure. (hint….the cure is in listening to what loneliness REALLY has to say to us!)


Loneliness – the scourge of Western society

I sometimes think loneliness is the greatest scourge of Western society.  Having lost our tribal connections, often separated from family and friends, we feel alone and adrift.  Even more problematic, however, is our loss of connection with OURSELVES.  This sense of separation from self (and others) is then experienced as a deep ache, an excruciating longing – often described as a “hole in the soul” that says, “I feel like there is something missing. Unaware of the true source and purpose of this aching loneliness, we seek outside ourselves for “the thing” that will fill this empty hole – or at the very least, ease the pain of longing.  It is the outward search for the remedy to this pain which is the cause of all our compulsive, addictive, unhealthy behaviors and all the “isms” that plague our society.  We drink, drug, eat, shop, consume, waste, abuse, acquire, collect, hoard, manipulate, control – all in an effort to avoid or numb the pang of loneliness.  What would happen if instead of running from or trying to medicate our loneliness we stopped and listened to what our loneliness is trying to say to us?  If we were brave enough to endure the pain of loneliness, for just a moment, and let our loneliness speak, what would s/he say?

Lauri Lumby provides support for your search for meaning, purpose and connection.  To set up a one-on-one, private session, call (920) 230-1313 or email

Loneliness Speaks:

Why do you run from me?  Why do you hide from my presence?  Why do you grasp after fleeting and temporary things like food, drink, drugs, meaningless sex, empty relationships, material possessions, wealth, status and power as a way to avoid my calling or silence the sound of my voice?  My task is not to harm.  My mission is not to cause pain.  My job is not to imprison.  Rather, my cause is to heal.  My hope to liberate.  My vocation, you see,  is only in compassionate and loving service to your SOUL.  The loneliness that you feel is none other than the voice of your soul CALLING YOU HOME – calling you home to all the places within yourself where you feel separate – most importantly from yourself – your true self – the person God made you to be with all your gifts and passions SHINING and EMPLOYED for your fulfillment and for the benefit of humankind. 

When you run from me, you are running from yourself.  When you numb or silence me, you are imprisoning yourself.  But….the Soul is persistent and will continue to seek your presence through loneliness, restlessness, impatience and pain until you PAY ATTENTION.  So, next time you feel the pang of loneliness, I implore you not to run or numb but STOP.  Pause for a moment and FEEL THE PAIN of loneliness.  Then, give me your attention.  Listen to where I am calling you.  Seek the guidance of my voice.  And say yes to your Soul CALLING YOU HOME.  In giving me your attention, by listening to my voice you will hear your truth as it reveals your gifts, stirs up your passions and compels you to nurture and cultivate these gifts so that you will one day be empowered to make these gifts a priority in your life giving you the fulfillment you long for and in the meantime, benefitting the world.  You were made for this purpose and your Soul will not rest until you fulfill its call….or forever be plagued with the pain of longing, loneliness, restlessness and discontent.


How will you respond to your loneliness?

Lauri Lumby provides support for your search for meaning, purpose and connection.  To set up a one-on-one, private session, call (920) 230-1313 or email 



I am a trained, professional Spiritual Director, Author and Hands-on Healer. I offer services, programs and classes that empower you to hear the voice of the Divine that speaks from within you. It is the voice of the Divine that leads us to our highest truth, to the discovery and cultivation of our gifts and to a life of Authentic Freedom where we know contentment, compassion and joy. Your truth will set you free!

4 thoughts on “Loneliness

  1. Lauri, you are such an amashing journlist who captures the soul of so many beating hearts! I am so thankful for the spirital and heart felt respect you gave me in my point of abandment, and now my loniness! Please keep doing what you do, as you have more followers than you realize! I send many of your blogs to many friends, patients and those who need a source of belonging!

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